


to the end of the world

by RENielsen



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Arranged Marriage, Enjoy!, Fluff, Happy with an angsty ending, M/M, Music, Non Famous, Nouis, Road Trips, Running Away, Strangers to Lovers, a bit of angst, but getting famous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-09-23
Packaged: 2019-07-15 17:47:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 26,278
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16068167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RENielsen/pseuds/RENielsen
Summary: “But still, arranging a marriage for him?”Louis stops breathing as soon as the words are over her lips. No! They wouldn’t! They can’t!or when Louis finds out what the future holds for him, he makes the only rational decision there is and runs away. He meets Niall along the way.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! So this is for the Nouis Fest 2018, which I've been so excited about, because so much Nouis content! Thanks to the mods for putting this whole thing together, and of course to everyone taking part. [Go check out what everyone else has done as well!](https://nouisfest2018.tumblr.com/)
> 
>  
> 
> I've been so nervous about this, especially because I barely finished this in time. I've been so busy these last couple of weeks, so I apologise for any mistakes there might be, I've tried my best to catch everything.  
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy!

_England_

Louis curses under his breath. Freaking lost in the middle of nowhere, and he’s forgotten his damn phone in the hurry to leave home. The rain is pouring down the roof so loudly Louis can barely even hear the car engine anymore. The wipers can’t remove the water fast enough from the windshield for Louis to be able to see outside clearly. All in all, then he feels fucking miserable, and he just wants to find somewhere to stay until the rain stops, but he’s got no idea where to even start looking.

He slows down the car a bit more, and by now he could walk faster than he’s driving. Not that it matters much anyway. He’s got nowhere to be, and better be safe than end up driving into a tree. He’d probably die if that happened, with no one else out there and no way to call anyone for help. Louis would rather not die tonight. While he’s already thrown everything away once today, then he doesn’t feel like actually throwing everything away.

For a mere second, he considers turning around to see if he can find the way back. He wants to pick up his phone so he’s able to find his way and so he’s got at least some sort of protection. He can’t though. Can’t turn back around now. If he did then he’d never be able to leave again, and Louis can’t stay there. Not anymore.

After a while more, Louis gives up. He won’t get anywhere in this weather anyway, so he carefully parks the car at the side of the road. It gives him time to regroup while he waits for the rain to calm down a little. He thinks there might be a map in the glovebox from that one time his dad took him camping three years ago. After looking through the mess for a while, Louis is able to let out a little shout of victory as he finds the crumpled-up map. He quickly straightens it out and tries to make sense of the map.

It’s easy enough locating Donny, but that’s also where his knowledge of maps seems to end. He’s been driving for a couple of hours, but the last two has been in slow motion so it’s hard judging how far he’s gotten. The last city he remembers driving through is Nottingham, where the idiotic thought of taking the small roads hit him. Louis hates himself sometimes and right now is exactly one of those times.

Maybe it’s stupid trying to find a way when he doesn’t even know where he wants to go. The map isn’t going to help him if there’s no goal except getting away from Doncaster. He’s already done that. He needs to figure out what’s next.

With a sigh, Louis throws the map unto the backseat and lets his head rest around the wheel. With closed eyes, he sits there and waits, listens to the heavy rain as he tries to get the last think up a plan. Maybe he should go to London. Big city, anonymous in a big crowd of people.  Goddammit if he at least knew what he wanted to do with his freaking life! Louis jumps in shock when he hits the car horn, and a loud honk follows right after.

“Three hours, and I’ve already forgotten my phone, got myself lost and scared myself half to death,” Louis grumbles and aggressively hits the car horn again. “No fucking wonder every single decision of my life seems to get made for me. Can’t do shit right.”

He’s so close to turning around and to accept his fate. Maybe he was meant for misery. Might as well accept it, instead of trying to run from it.

The rain stops just like that. The sun isn’t out, but when Louis looks out then he’s able to catch a glimpse of blue sky far away.

“London,” he breathes out. “Just one more try.”

The engine starts with a soft hum, and Louis lets the wipers move back and forth a couple of times until the windshield is mostly free of water. For a moment he looks down the road, not sure if he should continue onwards, or go back. The map won’t do him any good as long as he doesn’t know where he is. On one hand, then he knows Nottingham can’t be far back the road, and that it would be a perfect starting point. On the other hand, though, then it feels too close to home and Louis doesn’t want to go back. He’s also like eighty per cent sure he’s gonna hit a city at some point if he continues the same way he drove earlier. Eighty per cent seems good enough for now.

Though he is able to drive a lot quicker now, then Louis still tries to keep the speed somewhat reasonable.  He’s not busy, he keeps telling himself, and he’s not.

He drives for a couple of minutes, half tries to decide if he feels like listening to music half wonders if there’s even going to be a signal out here. He’s about to reach out for the radio when he catches a glimpse of something a bit ahead. Or someone to be more specific.

As Louis gets closer and closer he notes how the lad is drenched, obviously having gotten caught in the rain. Louis also notes how he seems to be limping with every step he takes. Louis pulls over to the side of the road as he reaches the lad.

“Are you alright?” Louis calls out of the window after lowering it.

“Great!” he gets back in return, a wide smile forming on the lad’s face. He slowly makes his way over to the car. He waves at Louis, the smile never leaving his face.

Louis looks at him doubtfully. He’s going to get sick wandering around like that. While in theory, it is summer, then the weather doesn’t act like it. Just looking at the other boy makes Louis want to hide away underneath a million blankets.

“Are you sure? Doesn’t look like it.”

“Yeah. Hitched a ride for a while, but then the guy turned out to be a total douche, so I’ve been walking the last couple of hours. Didn’t have anywhere to seek shelter when it started raining.”

“And your leg?” Louis asks, a douche driver is kinda vague and Louis needs to make sure the guy didn’t do him anything.

The lad in front of him looks down like he’s forgotten everything about his limping. He then lights up in another smile. Louis is beginning to doubt he’s got any other emotion than happy. “I’ve got a dodgy knee. Exercise is good and all, as long as I don’t go on a hike lasting hours. It’s probably gonna be a bitch tomorrow. I’ve tried worse, though.”

“That’s not really reassuring.”

Louis can’t keep the frown from his face.  He doesn’t know what to do with himself, or with this stranger. He’s not sure he’s comfortable with giving the lad a ride, but he can’t leave him here either! What if his leg gives under him completely, or he dies from the cold? Louis can’t live with that on his conscience.

The decision is made for him when it starts raining again. It’s not nearly as bad as it was before, but still.

“Do you want a lift?” he sighs, waving to the empty passenger seat beside him.

It’s not like Louis is all that busy anyway so he can drop the lad off where he needs to go. Or at the closest city with a train station if the destination happens to be anywhere near home.

“Only if it’s not a bother. Don’t mind continuing walking,” the lad says with a shrug. Because of course he doesn’t. By now Louis doesn’t think anything could ever bother him. It’s unnatural that’s what it is. What’s worst of it all is that it doesn’t even seem like pretend. Like what even?

It’d be a lie to say Louis doesn’t grumble when he tells the lad to get into the car before he dies of pneumonia.

The lad laughs with his whole body, almost tumbles over as he grins at Louis’ words. They weren’t even funny. Louis rolls his eyes but holds back the snarky remark as he watches the lad take off what looks like a guitar bag and a backpack and places both items in the backseat of the car, before finding his way into the front. Louis winces a bit when the soaked clothes make contact with the seat. Great.

“Where are you going anyways?”

“Towards London, but you can drop me off wherever it's convenient. Shouldn’t be too hard finding a way as long as you don’t drop me on the side of an abandoned road.”

“No worries. I’m going to London as well,” Louis mutters, and starts driving once again. “Don’t have the foggiest what the easiest way to go is, though, so unless you’ve got any ideas then I’m gonna continue the way I was driving?”

When he only receives a shrug in return, Louis does just that.

“I’m Niall by the way,” the lad, Niall, says after a minute of silence. While Louis is happy to get a name to the face, then he also can’t help but dread Niall is one of those types who can’t handle silence and is going to expect of Louis that they’ll be talking the whole way. Louis just isn’t in the mood.

“Louis,” he says in return, not meeting Niall’s glance, but focusing on the road, like a responsible adult, and definitely not because he’s being a child about this whole situation. Any other day then maybe he would have had the energy for this, but this whole day is just here to bug him.

For a while they drive in silence, but then Niall starts humming quietly, and while the sound is actually quite nice, then Louis wants him to shut up. His fingers clench around the steering wheel but then relaxes again as Louis scolds himself silently. Stop being a dick. Give the kid a chance. C’mon Tommo!

For what it’s worth then Niall doesn’t talk to him, so he supposes the humming does do at least some sort of good. It’s first when the road split into two, and Louis slows down the car that Niall finally addresses him again.

“I came from that way,” Niall says, pointing left. “The road split a couple of places, but from what I’ve seen it mostly leads back north.”

“Guess we’ll go left then. Wish I remembered my bloody phone.” He mumbles the last part, not wanting to talk about it. Niall looks over at him for a second but doesn’t say anything about it. Maybe he isn’t all that bad after all. “I’m starting to doubt we’re ever going to find civilisation.”

Niall snorts at him. “You’re a quite pessimistic person, aren’t ya?”

“I like to call it being realistic.” Or having a bad day, but Louis doesn’t say that.

The words only got the other giggling into his hands, hiding his face. It’s disgustingly adorable. Louis makes sure to roll his eyes for good measure in case Niall should happen to look up at him. There’s no way he’s going to encourage how ridiculous Niall’s being.

It can’t be more than a couple of seconds that pass by in silence before Niall starts babbling about golf of all things in the world. Louis tries to hum at the right places, but he doesn’t know anything about golf, and he isn’t all that interested either. The only thing that catches his attention is when Niall tells him a story about caddying for some golfer and falling flat on his arse on national telly.

“Really?” he can’t help but ask, smirk clear on his face. Maybe he’ll have to look that up sometime. Just the image in his head is hilarious, the real thing would be a laugh to watch.

“Unfortunately, yeah, but it does make for a great story. Me friend loves to use it as blackmail every time he wants something from me. Still somehow doesn’t realise I don’t care and just really doesn’t mind helping him.”

“You’re a bit of a choir boy, aren’t ya?” Louis asks imitating Niall’s accent, absolutely killing it. In the bad way of the sense if the eye roll he receives for his trouble is anything to go by.

“I like to call it being nice,” Niall says not even hesitating. He does a lot better at nailing his accent than Louis would ever be able to do. Alright then.

“Goody two shoes,” he mutters, and Niall wriggles his eyebrows, not the least bit offended.

Niall picks right back up on his very one-sided conversation about golf, just to move on to other sports Louis doesn’t follow either, though everything is better than the golf thing. Who under fifty even knows anything about that anyways? Louis perks up just as Niall starts talking about the latest footie match he watched on the telly, but before he can even join the conversation, Niall closes it down with a sudden laugh.

“See! A town right ahead!” He’s leaning forward in his seat as he points towards a cluster of houses coming into sight not far away from them. 

“Not sure it counts as a town when there are only three houses in sight,” Louis grumbles out, but really, he’s so relieved. Even three houses mean he won’t drive in a ditch just yet and die because no one is around to help him up again.

Niall squints his eyes and mouths something, and it takes Louis a second to realise that he’s trying to read what the city sign is saying.

“Wymeswold!” he excitedly ends up blurting out, and before Louis can even answer he’s got his phone in his hands typing something. He then starts pouting at the phone seconds later, and Louis forces his eyes back on the road. “So, you’re partly right. There are more than three houses, but Wymeswold is considered being a village, not a town.”

Louis looks at him in disbelief. “Niall,” he says impatiently, and Niall’s eyes snap up to look at him. “Why for fuck's sake aren’t you using the GPS if you’ve got a signal!?”

“Why didn’t you just remember you own bloody phone if you’re that afraid of a bit adventure?” Niall fires back at him. Louis wants to strangle him. He won’t have to listen to his annoying voice anymore, and he’ll have a GPS. It’s a win-win really.

Like hell, Louis is going to tell a goddamn stranger anything about his situation. He’s feeling pathetic enough about it as it is! He doesn’t need this guy’s pity if he found out why Louis was in such a hurry to leave!

“Why don’t you stay out of business that isn’t yours?” he snaps. It doesn’t make him feel any better when Niall looks away, hurt flashing from every feature of his face. “Sorry, alright? Just don’t push that, please.” Niall doesn’t say anything in return, but eventually, he nods a quick abrupt nod. Louis wants to say sorry once again, but instead, he changes the topic entirely. “We should find a place to buy you some dry clothes before you get sick, mate.”

Niall’s voice is small and quiet when he answers, “Yeah, we probably should.”

His head is turned towards the window as Louis drives through the town, not once glancing back over at Louis. Louis curses himself out for being a dick. He’s already said sorry, though, and he isn’t sure what else he’s supposed to be doing. He doesn’t know Niall, and he doesn’t know how to make it better. The only thing he wants is for this whole trip to be over with. Louis doesn’t like that out of everything, then he was the reason the smile disappeared from Niall’s face.

It doesn’t take long for Louis to find a store that looks at least somewhat promising. It’s a small thrift store, but Louis figures it’ll be fine until Niall’s own clothes are dry. He parks the car by the pavement on the other side of the road. He drums uneasily on the steering wheel, but Niall still doesn’t look over at him.

“You don’t have to come with me in,” Niall mutters. He’s out of the car before Louis can even think to answer.

He wants to follow Niall inside but stays where he is. Niall didn’t want him to go anyways. With a sigh, he lets his head rest against the steering wheel and closes his eyes. He’s not sure how long it takes before the car door opens, and something is thrown towards Louis. The squeak that leaves him is loud and embarrassing, and he looks over at Niall with wide eyes. Niall though seems to be back in his carefree and happy mode because he’s laughing right into Louis’ face. Rude, really!

“Got you something,” he says unnecessarily, pointing towards the object that landed in Louis’ lap.

Louis studies the lad for a moment longer as he gets into the car. He’s dressed in a simple shirt and a pair of joggers. He’s got a hoodie over one arm and in the other a bag with his wet clothes and shoes. The clothes are a little big on him but other than that it’s not so bad.

As Niall throws the bag of wet clothes into the backseat, Louis finally looks down on the thing thrown at him. His mind goes kinda blank as he looks it over. His eyes move from the object and meet Niall’s.

“It’s no phone but should do what you wanted out of the phone anyway.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal at all, and maybe it’s not, but somehow it still feels like it. “Newest model they had, not that it says much probably,” he then adds with a laugh.

Louis clings to the small navigation device with his fingers. Niall found him a freaking GPS, even though Louis was being an arse to him. They’ve known each other for half an hour, at most, and Louis hasn’t even been that nice at all, except offering him a ride, and yet he still does his best to make Louis feel better.

“I’d let you use my phone, but the battery is almost dead, and you weren’t the only idiot who didn’t think things through before they left. Forgot the charger back home, so I’ll have to buy a new one once we get to London.”

“I… thank you,” Louis says with his voice small but grateful.

Niall just shrugs again, and then stretches and gets more comfortable in his seat. Louis notices how he carefully rubs his left knee. As Louis starts setting up the GPS, he tries to bite his tongue. He still ends up asking, “You sure you’re alright?” because Louis will never be able to shut up even when something isn’t his business. Louis will pretend it is at least a little bit, considering the fact that Niall is in his car and Louis will be the one having to drive him to the hospital is he turns out not to be. Perfectly reasonable.

“Better now,” Niall says softly, though he doesn’t let up at his knee.

“Alright then. Tell me if that changes?” Niall salutes him, all serious faced, and Louis can’t help the small laugh that leaves him. It eases up a bit of his worry too because he wouldn’t be joking around like that if it was bad. At least Louis hopes he wouldn’t.

He finally gets the GPS to work, and after realising that he doesn’t have a specific goal in mind, he just writes London, England into the device. Turns out the fastest way is to drive back through Nottingham which leads onto the more direct motorway towards London. Of course. Figures he’ll have to drive all the way back there after all this trouble. Glancing over at Niall, he can’t help but think that all the trouble was worth it for him to find the lad. There’s something about him, Louis can’t quite put his finger on.

The humming coming from Niall seems far less obnoxious this time, and Louis finds he quite enjoys the quiet sound. He tries to concentrate on the road, but he’s far too attuned to every little movement Niall makes to be able to focus. They get back through Nottingham and out onto the motorway safely enough, though.

¤¤¤

Louis is not sure why the low murmurs from downstairs seem interesting enough for him to pause his movie and sneak out into the hallway and down the stairs to be able to hear better. The last time he could be bothered to do that was when he was twelve. He sits down on the bottom of the staircase and let his head rest against the wall into the living room. Here he can more easily hear his mum and dad talking on the other side of the wall.

“I’m still not sure Louis will be too thrilled by the idea?” he hears his mum say, and Louis perks up by the mention of his name.

“The boy needs to get out of the nest he’s been making here. And it’ll be a good deal for the business, Johannah, you know that.”

“But still, arranging a marriage for him?”

Louis stops breathing as soon as the words are over her lips. No! They wouldn’t! They can’t!

“He’s not a kid anymore,” his dad says, and there’s a bit of an edge to his tone, just like the one he always uses when he’s done arguing. It’s easy to imagine how he’s got an eyebrow raised and a cold expression in his eyes. It’s easy because it’s the expression that goes right along with the tone of his voice and has done so ever since Louis was a kid.

His mum doesn’t say anything more, though Louis is silently begging her to keep arguing against him. Please, tell him no. Please don’t let him get away with that.

“We’ll talk to him about it tomorrow. Get him prepared for the idea. I’d like for the wedding to happen sooner rather than later. There’s no real reason to drag this out.”

“I suppose,” she says, and after that they both quiet down.

Louis’ heart is beating hard in his chest, apparently trying to escape any minute now. He stays sitting at the bottom of the stairs for a moment longer, just in case. The hope disappears second by second when none of them says anything more. He wants it all to be a joke, but he knows it isn’t. His dad’s been hinting for a while now, wanting him to take interest in the business or at least do something with his life. Louis hadn’t listened to him, but he hadn’t thought this would be the outcome. That he’ll have to marry some girl, because that’s all his dad thinks he’s good for anymore. He just can’t do that.

It’s without thinking he gets up from where he’s sitting. He needs to get away. They’ll tell him tomorrow and then it’s too late. Right now, he still has an advantage. It’s still early in the day, and he’ll have a lot of daylight to drive in if he goes now, and he’ll have enough daylight to come up with some sort of plan as soon as he’s gone from here. He needs to get away.

He almost falls over his own feet in his hurry to get back to his room. His hands shake badly as he starts gathering clothes into a bag, showing as much as he can in there, before also throwing his wallet down in the smaller pocket on the backpack. He grabs his car keys and swings the bag over his shoulder before he tiptoes back downstairs.

When he reaches the bottom, he carefully looks inside the living room. His dad is on the laptop, probably working because Louis can’t remember the last time he did anything just for the fun of it. His mum is flipping through the newspaper, while also watching her favourite show on the telly.

They won’t even notice, he tells himself. He swallows harshly and tries to fight the tears that almost fall down his cheek. Probably won’t care either. Why would they?

Louis shakes his head, trying to clear it up. He still hesitates for a moment longer, but eventually, he sneaks past the living room. As silently as possible he takes on his shoes and grabs his jacket. He closes the door behind him as soon as he gets outside, and he breathes out, not even having noticed that he held his breath.

The direction he picks when he starts driving is random. The only thing that matters is getting away.

¤¤¤

Louis gets shaken out of his thoughts as Niall reaches for the radio and turns on the music. Some radio host Louis doesn’t recognise is babbling about something, but he doesn’t get a chance to figure out what he’s saying before Niall’s skipping the channels until he finds Radio 1. It starts in the middle of a Justin Bieber song, Louis has heard a couple of times before on the radio and in the stores. Apparently, it’s topping the charts right now. Not that Louis gets why. To him, it seems to blend in with everything else most pop artists are currently making.

His head whips over at Niall when the other boy starts singing along to every word of the song. He’s nodding along to the music, not once looking up at Louis.

“I didn’t take you as a Bieber fan,” Louis snorts, trying to hide the smile from showing on his lips. Mostly because Niall’s voice is lovely, and he could probably sing anything and then Louis would still like it.

Niall shrugs, finishing of the verse before finally paying attention to Louis. “I’m more into the good oldies, but nothing wrong with a bit of Bieber. He’s made some tunes.”

The song changes into another one Louis doesn’t know and apparently, neither does Niall, though he’s still humming along to the melody. It’s quite cute how the music seems to be a permeant part of him. How some part of him constantly seems to be attuned to it even when there’s no music playing.

The drive goes by quickly. Niall is easy company; babbling about one thing after the other not once making it seem forced or fake. When he’s not talking he’s singing along to the radio, and Louis keeps having to shift his eyes back to the road, when they drift to watch Niall and how he never sits still. Not even an hour into the ride, and his bad mood is replaced with smiles and content.

It’s easy, but they get closer and closer to London by the minute, and Louis doesn’t feel ready to go back to the whirlwind of just bad that filled his mind. He likes how it’s easier to breathe and smile with Niall beside him.

You’re just giving him a ride, Louis scolds himself. You’ll be alone once again when you get to London. He wants to smack himself. Leave it to him to become dependent on someone after having known them for a few hours.

He decides to ignore the lump in his throat. It’s not for any good anyways.

“What’s the plan then? When we get to London, that’s it,” Louis then asks, fiddling with the steering wheel. He doesn’t look at Niall, but he’s become awfully aware of him through the last couple of hours. It’s like no matter how much Louis is looking at the road, then he’s still able to see every single movement the other boy makes. It’s weird thinking that soon he won’t be right beside Louis anymore. Louis will be on his own, and he still doesn’t know what to do with himself.

“I’m gonna go to LA, mate! It’s sunny and warm and far away from here. It’s the perfect place to start out, get a record deal, make music and become like proper famous, you know? I wanna be big, like Justin Bieber or Beyoncé. Sell out arenas, have people singing along to every word.” Niall sighs with a small smile on his lips. His eyes are closed, and his head is resting against the car seat. He looks utterly relaxed like he isn’t in a car with a stranger. Louis doesn’t know how he does it.

“LA?” Louis says, and he winces when he hears how small his voice sounds. He doesn’t know why that sounds like such a terrible idea. For some reason, he just likes the idea of having Niall in the same city as him, for the possibility to someday run into him again. How is he going to do that if Niall is on the other side of the world?

“Yeah. A whole new adventure. Been waiting for this me whole life. At least it feels like it.”

Louis doesn’t ask any more questions, and Niall doesn’t say anything more either. Instead, they just drive the last bit of the way towards London, and towards Louis being alone once again.

It’s first when Louis spots the sign saying central London in one lane and the airport in the other that he speaks up once again.

“Suppose I should drop you off at the airport then?”

Niall shrugs like it’s no big deal where he’s dropped off. Louis supposes it probably isn’t compared to being left on the side of the road god knows where to walk miles until finding someone else to drive him the rest of the way in the pouring rain. How Niall is still in such a good mood is beyond Louis.

“Not sure if I can find a charger for my phone at the airport, so maybe somewhere in the city? I’m sure I’ll be able to take the tube to the airport once I’ve got everything I need. But if you prefer dropping me off at the airport then that’s fine too.”

Louis blinks into the lane towards central London without a word. He doesn’t even think about it, and just does exactly as Niall asks of him. It’s the most reasonable thing anyways, he argues for himself. He’s got nothing to do at the airport. Louis is going to stay in London and figure something out for himself. If just he was quite able to convince himself that there isn’t a pull to follow Niall wherever he’s planning to go.

“What are you gonna do in London then? Or is that topic just as sensitive as the phone thing?” Niall interrupts his thoughts, and Louis wishes he had an answer. Maybe it would be easier to convince himself to let Niall go then. He winces slightly when Niall mentions the phone deal and sends the other boy an apologetic glance. 

“I don’t know. Don’t have any, I suppose. Just needed to get away from home.”

He gets a hum in response, and Niall looks over at him contemplating. His eyes bore into him like Louis is completely bare. He shifts in his seat and avoids Niall’s glance at all costs. He’d probably look directly into Louis’ head then, and Louis doesn’t like the thought of having anyone inside his mind.

There’s no way he could have ever prepared for Niall’s next words. His heart skips a beat, and his breath catches. It takes all his power to not jerk his head towards Niall.

“You could come with me?” Niall suggests, doing so with such a nonchalant manner that throws Louis of his game, because, what? “You know if you’ve got nothing better to do anyway. Could be fun.”

He could. He’d been reasonable enough to throw his backpack into the back seat of the car before he left, and he remembers how his passport is safely hidden in one of the pockets after the last time he was in France for the weekend with his parents. He could leave and not look back over his shoulder, and just follow Niall around until the other boy gets tired of him. Maybe he won’t get tired of him since he’s offering Louis to come with.

Could be fun, Niall said. Maybe that’s what he needs right now. To just do it and have fun with his life.

“Okay,” he says, no hesitation in his voice.

The smile he gets in return is bright, and Louis has got no regrets at all. Everything in him yells it’s the right decision, and being with Niall, no matter where they end up, will be better than anything else. It’s crazy and ridiculous, and Louis shouldn’t be so comfortable with the thought of it.

“So how do you feel about getting rid of your car?” Niall asks with a raised eyebrow. It’s obvious he’s trying to stop the smile from showing on his face, and instead, keep it serious. He’s failing miserably, but Louis still doesn’t think he’s joking.

“What!?” Louis shrieks, eyes becoming big. Niall snorts out a laugh.

¤¤¤

Turns out Niall is very efficient when he wants to be. Within the hour Louis is a car shorter and instead has got enough cash for a plane ticket and whatever else he should need on the trip safely tucked into his wallet. He didn’t get what the car was worth, but he supposes he can’t expect so either, throwing a deal this fast. It’s not like it matters anyway. He’s not planning on coming back anytime soon, and a bit money is better than letting the car sit somewhere in London and get ruined or stolen while he’s away.

Niall’s also managed to find a new charger for his phone and find some new clothes to replace the wet ones he had in his backpack.

“It’s not healthy having it curled up when it’s wet, Lou, and it’s not like I’ll have the change to hang it while we’re in the air,” he explained when Louis asked. The explanation is reasonable, but Louis still rolls his eyes. That’s so responsible and grown up of him, and he can’t impossibly be any older than Louis. It wouldn’t even surprise Louis at all if Niall’s also the type of person who’s keeping his room neat and would have a meltdown if he ever saw Louis’. Good thing that’s not something that’s gonna happen.

It’s getting late by the time they’re sitting on the tube, with each their bag and Niall his bag for the guitar in addition. Louis tries to make himself as small as possible, as he’s got Niall sitting beside him on one side and some rude, sweaty middle-aged man sitting way too close to him on the other. Louis despises the tube, and it does not help that Niall keeps laughing at him and whispering into his ear that it could have been tons worse had they taken it earlier in the day.

Louis lets out a breath when the man gets out at the next stop, and Niall breaks down in giggles. It’s not funny! It’s easy for him to laugh when no one’s able to sit down beside him!

“Your face is priceless, mate!” The only thing Louis can answer to that is a grumble. It is not!

Luckily for Louis then they’ve only got a couple of stops left, and no one sits down beside him through the last of the trip. Louis’ not sure if it’s because he’s sending mean glances at everyone who even dares to look in their direction, but it probably is to be fair. He can’t bring himself to care, though.

“C’mon,” Niall says and picks up his two bags when the tube stops once again.

Louis swings his own bag over his shoulder and can relieved leave the tube behind. Hopefully, he won’t have to do anything like that again in a very long time, or preferably never again.

They only get to take a couple of steps out of the tube before they’re surrounded by people. It’s all very typical for the airport, so Louis isn’t surprised. Niall though seems a bit thrown off his game and takes a step back which results in him backing right into Louis. Louis grips his arm to balance him.

“You okay?” he asks with a frown. He fights the impulse to put his arms around Niall. That’d be weird.

“Yeah, sorry,” Niall says, taking a couple of deep breaths. “I’m a tad claustrophobic. Nothing to worry about.”

The frown on Louis’ face becomes deeper. Niall’s face, on the other hand, seems a bit paler, which is impressive with how fair his skin is already. “Doesn’t seem like nothing, lad.”

“It just came quite sudden, alright? I’m fine,” Niall bites out and pulls his arm away from Louis’ hand. Without thinking, Louis reaches out for his free hand instead. It’s a bit clammy, but Louis doesn’t care because it makes Niall relax a little in his shoulders.

“So, we don’t get lost from one another, yeah?” he says and sends what he hopes is a reassuring smile.

Niall nods and doesn’t fight his grip this time. Louis slowly starts pulling Niall along, while he also tries to avoid the biggest crowds of people to give the lad a bit of a break. Every once in a while, he squeezes Niall’s hand gently and sends him a smile over his shoulder. It helps a little with the number of people there when first they get away from the area where the tube is.

The fingers squeezing tightly around his own eases up their grip as soon as they leave the underground area. Louis still doesn’t let go of Niall’s hand, though, and Niall doesn’t make any movement to pull away either.

As Louis has been at the airport a couple of times before with his parents, then it isn’t all that hard to find his way through it. It doesn’t take long at all to find their way to where they can buy their plane tickets. Louis is still holing Niall’s hand as they get in line, and none of them pulls away as they wait for it to be their turn.

Eventually, they’re greeted with a nice smile from the lady behind the counter.

“Hello, what can I help you with?” she asks.

“We’d like two tickets for the next flight to LA, please,” Niall says, smile big and bright. A right flirt is what he is, Louis can’t help but think as Niall lets go of his hand and leans closer in over the counter as he’s been best friends with the lady for years.

She seems a bit perplexed for a short moment, but then she shakes her head and starts typing something on the keyboard. “Hm, let’s see,” she mutters, reading on the computer. “I’m sorry, lads, the last plane with two free seats left a couple of hours ago. Everything is booked. The earliest I can get you both on a plane to LA will be a couple of days from now. The only thing I’ve got is one free seat on the plane leaving tomorrow morning.”

Louis feels his stomach sink. Niall’s gonna take the seat. This is his dream and his plan all along, and he doesn’t need Louis to come with him. The idea might have been fun when it was a possibility, but there’s no way he’s going to turn down the seat to stay behind with Louis.

Niall glances back at him for a short second, and Louis can see the wheels spinning inside his head. Just get it over with, there’s no need to pull it out like this. Louis wishes he knew what he’ll do once Niall finally does say the words. He’ll have to take the tube back along and figure something out for the night. Maybe he’ll have to give it all up, find a place he can borrow a phone, and make the call back home to get someone to come and pick him up.

He doesn’t expect the next thing Niall says, and he almost breaks his neck in his hurry to look over at the other lad.

“Have you got any two seats available for the US? If you can get us that far it’d be great,” Niall says, looking back at Louis once again. He’s looking soft and there’s light in his eyes. Louis’ heart if beating crazily fast.

It hits him then. He’s not going to be left behind.

The lady starts typing once again, and it doesn’t take long for her to look up at them with a smile. “I’ve got two free seats for New York leaving in two and a half hours?”

“We’ll take them!”

After getting the price, Niall pulls out his wallet and pay for both tickets before Louis can even react or protest. He’s got more than enough money himself, and he could have easily paid for it. He doesn’t feel like protesting in front of the lady and the huge line of people behind them, so he keeps his mouth shut, while the lady gives them a lot of information Louis is only half listening to. Niall seems to be paying attention so hopefully, it’s going to be alright.

When they finally get away from the line of people, Louis can’t help but ask, “What’s the plan exactly? How are we gonna get from New York to LA?” His voice becomes a bit more unsure when he adds, “Why didn’t you take the ticket to LA?”

Niall abruptly stops walking and turns around to face Louis with a serious expression on his face. “Hey, I asked you to come with me. What kind of arse would I have been, had I left you here now? We’ll get there, alright? We’ll figure something out when we get to New York. Maybe we can get a ticket for a plane to LA once we’re there. We’ll do this together. Yeah?”

“Yeah, okay,” he mutters. He didn’t get much of an answer to his question, but, somehow, he still feels loads better from Niall’s words. Together. Niall won’t leave him behind.


	2. Chapter 2

_United States of America_

Louis is grumpy as fuck as they stand in the airport in New York waiting for their bags. The flight seemed to drag on for ages, and Louis didn’t even get to sit with Niall. Instead, he was placed in front of a little kid who kicked his seat, and beside a man who was snoring into his ear on one side, and a young woman who was blasting music in her earphones. He’s so exhausted that he’s considering taking a nap standing. Maybe Niall would let him lend his shoulder while they wait.

It’s early evening in New York, and Louis has got no idea what they’re going to do now. The chance of getting a flight is probably as slim now as it was back in London.

“Maybe we should find a motel for the night?” Niall says, looking at Louis considering. “You look half dead right now, mate.”

“Shut up! Just because you had nice people sitting next to you, so you were able to nap,” Louis grumbles in return, but really a motel sounds like heaven. A bed, sleep. Yes, please. Where does Louis sign up?

It takes a while longer before they’ve gathered their bags. The fresh air on his face helps a bit with the sleepiness, at least enough that he stays awake through watching Niall find them a taxi. He vaguely hears Niall mention the word motel before he’s sleeping with his head resting against the window.

Way too soon something is shaking him, and Louis groans and blindly tries to push whatever it is away.

“Louis, you need to get out of the taxi. I’ve found a bed for you to sleep in,” Niall coaxes, shaking Louis once again.

A bed does sound quite tempting, so after another moment with his eyes closed, Louis finally manages to open them and look up at Niall. He blinks a couple of times, tries to wake up and clear his head.

“C’mon now, lad. Up we go.”

“My bag,” Louis mutters, as Niall starts pulling him away from the cab without grabbing any of their bags from the boot of the car.

“I’ve grabbed those already.”

And oh, isn’t Niall just a blessing? He definitely is, as he forgoes the check-in, and just drags Louis along towards a room, where he uses the keycard to open the door. Louis ignores the fact that there’s only one double bed in the room and just tosses off his shoes and faceplants the bed. He’s snoring quietly before his head even touches the pillow.

It’s the smell of coffee that eventually wakes him up. That or the sharp light filling the room all of a sudden.

“Are you gonna sleep all day?” Niall asks, and Louis just groans in return. Well, he would have, had Niall not been such a pain in the arse.

“Why aren’t you sleeping all day?” Louis whines, but he does end up sitting up slowly in the bed. He watches Niall with squinted eyes, as they’re still not quite used to the light in the room. Niall’s sitting on the other side of the bed with two cups in his hands.

Niall doesn’t bother answering his question, and instead just rolls his eyes at Louis. That was probably deserved for the dumb question, though there’s no reason to be rude. “You seem like a tea type of person, so I’ve got you a cup. You can have the coffee, though, if you’d rather?”

“Tea, please,” Louis says, making grabby hands towards the cup.

Niall laughs and hands over one of the cups. He looks a bit smug even with the laughter, and Louis assumes he’s probably well happy he got the tea thing right. Louis is not sure what a tea type of person seems like, or what exactly triggered that idea in Niall, but he’s grateful. Every kind of tea is gonna be better than coffee. Not that coffee can’t be well and truly fine also.

“How long have you been up?” Louis asks, after sipping at his tea for a couple of minutes. The silence is comfortable, though Louis kinda misses the soft hum that filled his ears through the whole drive through England.

“Long enough to have found us a way to LA. Hope you’re up for road tripping through the states?”

“Wait, really? You’ve got us a car?” Louis asks, not really believing his own ears. Niall just wriggles his eyebrows at Louis, but sure enough, when they get outside a little while later there’s a car waiting for them. It’s not really anything fancy, but the car doesn’t look like it’s going to fall apart any time soon either, so Louis takes that as a win.

Niall throws a pair of keys towards Louis, and Louis catches them surprisingly easily. His eyes are wide as he looks over at Niall. How even? Louis suddenly feels unsure whether he’s been sleeping for days without waking up because there’s no way Niall would have been able to pull this off otherwise. For god sake, Louis wouldn’t even have known where to start!

He doesn’t ask, and instead just get into the car. The laugh that leaves him when he notices a familiar GPS sitting in there, is surprised but also quite happy. How he hadn’t even noticed Niall keeping the small device is beyond him. He smirks up at Niall, who just shrugs happily in return.

¤¤¤

Niall makes him stop before they leave the city. He leaves Louis in the car and comes back ten minutes later with a shopping bag in his hands.

“I bought us snacks!” he says, holding up the bag for Louis to see.

Louis just shakes his head, fonder than anything else really. He starts the car back up, and pulls onto the road, while Niall starts rummaging around the bag. It’s not actually any snacks Niall pulls out of the bag for a starter. Instead, he finds a bottle of water and a little package of painkillers. Niall pops two out and drowns them down with a sip of the water.

“You alright?” Louis asks, the fond expression turning into a frown. He tries to concentrate on the road, but his eyes keep flickering back to Niall.

“Told you my knee would be killing me today, didn’t I? All that walking, it‘s just not good for it. I’ve tried worse, though. As long as you don’t expect me to do any hiking today, then I’ll be alright,” Niall just sighs, letting his head rest against the car seat.

 “Guess I’ll just have to leave you in the car then, while I go hiking,” Louis says, trying to keep the mood light. “There’s no way you get to ruin me plans now!”

A crooked smile turns up on Niall’s face. It doesn’t seem as genuine as his smile usually does, but when Louis catches his eyes for a short second he sees how soft Niall’s eyes are and how grateful he seems that Louis doesn’t keep poking the subject. Without having to ask, Louis just knows that it’s not something Niall likes talking about. He wonders how bad it has been before. Niall keeps saying he’s tried so much worse, but by the way he’s gently massaging his knee, then it’s not just a little pain now either.

Louis wants to do something, anything really, to make Niall feel better. He doesn’t like the way his face strains whenever he seems to hit a real sore spot with his fingers. The only thing he’s able to do is to keep the conversation going to distract Niall from the pain. It’s working well enough, and eventually, Niall falls asleep with his head rested against the window of the car while Louis talks about something totally meaningless.

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that the pain in his knee has kept him up most of the night, so Louis lets him sleep. Doesn’t mind the way he sighs in his sleep and mutters out words that don’t make sense any other place than in Niall’s dreams.

¤¤¤

According to Niall then the only way to take the trip is to take the longest way possible by driving alongside the coast as far as they can. When Louis reminds him that they’ll end up in Mexico if they do that, he just laughs and says to follow the coast as long as they’re still in the US then. Louis probably gives in too easily.

¤¤¤

Louis grabs for Niall’s phone when it starts ringing. Niall took over driving the car a couple of hours ago after waking up still a bit groggy. He’d insisted that it was his turn even though Louis tried to argue that he really didn’t have to if his knee was still hurting. In the end, he had given in and switched seats with Niall. So really, he’s just being responsible by looking who’s ringing so Niall won’t be distracted while driving.

The screen is lit up, with the word ‘ma’ written across it. Louis’ hands become clammy with the thought of his own mother.

“It’s your mum,” he says and looks over at Niall as he does so.

He doesn’t exactly expect the gloomy expression on Niall’s face. How there’s no trace of a smile, and how his eyes seem to have become a bit darker from every other time Louis has looked at him. Louis doesn’t like the way his hands are tightly gripping the steering wheel or how he can almost hear how Niall is grinding his teeth against each other.

“Just let it go to voicemail. I’ll deal with it later,” Niall says, shrugging like it’s not a problem. He’s bad at pretending, though. The usual lightness in his face is gone, and Louis misses it already.

So, Louis does as he’s told. He ignores the continuing ringing and throws the phone unto the backseat of the car so Niall won’t have to look at it or think about the call if he doesn’t want to. “Alright, lad?”

Niall just shrugs again, not saying anything for a long time. Slowly he gets less tense in the body, and his eyes get less dark. He doesn’t say anything until his fingers are once again loosely holding the steering wheel.

“They wanted something for me that I didn’t want,” he finally says, voice so quiet that Louis barely hears. “A lot of things, really. Business school and the perfect house and family.”

Louis hums, not knowing what to say. It hits a bit too close to home for his liking.

“I just wanna make music.” The words are said with a small sigh like it’s a discussion he’s had a billion times before. He quiets down for a couple of minutes, but then he continues with more determination. “You know, I’m gonna make it one day.”

Louis looks over at him, sees how his brows are scrunched close to one another, and how his jaw is clenching. To Louis, that’s not really a question at all. To him, Niall doesn’t seem like someone who gives up before he’s got what he wants, through good and bad. He wouldn’t be road tripping through the states to get to LA if he wasn’t going for the win. Besides, there’s just something about Niall that tells Louis that there’s no other place he belongs that up on a stage entertaining people. Louis doesn’t see Niall ever settling down right in a normal nine to five job, with the same boring tasks over and over again. He can see him up on that stage, though, like he’s born for nothing else.

“I’ve got no doubts that you will,” he answers with a small smile on his lips. Niall whips his head towards Louis quickly, loses all focus on the road for a minute before realising what he’s doing and turns his eyes back on the road. His eyes are big and wide, and at that moment, Louis just knows that no one has ever told him that before. That his parents didn’t just want something else for him, they didn’t believe that he would be able to do what he wanted out of life.

It makes Louis’ heart hurt, that Niall’s dreams have never been supported, because if anyone deserves it then it’s Niall.

“Nialler,” he softly says, though this time Niall keeps his eyes on the road. “You know what, lad? Fuck what everyone else thinks gonna happen. The only thing important is what you want to happen. There’s no one here who’s got anything to say about your future. You’re free, and you can do whatever you want. What’s going to get you there is your heart wanting it. And it does, so use that!” Louis wants to reach for Niall, but he doesn’t wanna distract him either, so he lets his knuckle collide gently with his own chest, once, twice, right over his heart. “Gotta use it while it’s still beating.”

Niall’s watching him out of the corner of his eyes, Louis can tell, while still keeping a mind on where he’s going. 

He pretends not to notice the way Niall’s hands tremor slightly, or how his breath catches a couple of times. It’s obvious that Louis has hit a wounded place in his heart, but Louis’ also got no doubt that he needed to hear those words to be able to heal it.

Later, much later, when Louis has long let go of the conversation in his head, Niall whispers out a quiet, “Thank you.”

¤¤¤

Niall’s phone rings often and insistently. Niall twitches every time but makes no move to pick it up. Louis pretends it never even makes a sound. Eventually, the calls become less, and at some point stops altogether. He doesn’t know if the caller finally gave up, or if Niall finally broke and did something to make the calls stop.

¤¤¤

“Where have you been?” Louis asks annoyed. He’s been waiting here for half an hour for Niall to come back to the car. Niall never even said that he left, but instead of waiting outside while Louis went in to buy food, then he’d been gone as soon as Louis got back outside with a bag of McDonald’s in his hands. The only reason he hadn’t thought Niall had left him completely is that he had left the guitar in the car. If there’s one thing Louis is completely sure Niall would never leave behind, then it’s the guitar.

Niall just grins at him, not bothered the slightest with the tone of his words. Stupidly carefree idiot!

“Sorry, got distracted, but I’ve got something for you!” he says brightly, but instead of showing Louis what he’s got then he walks right past Louis and gets into the car. Instead of taking the passenger seat like he’s been doing, Niall gets comfortable in the driver’s seat.

Louis sighs but walks around the car and get inside. He buckles himself in, and then just looks over at Niall, who doesn’t make any move to turn on the engine and starts driving.

“I’ve got you something,” Niall repeats and smiles up at Louis.

“I know. You said,” Louis says dryly because he might be a bit salty over Niall just fucking off without telling him anything. “Are you also gonna show me then?”

Niall pouts, and Louis just smirks in return. Without answering, Niall starts fumbling for something in his pocket, and then hold his hand out towards Louis a bit shyly. It’s a simple black leather bracelet with three small silver charms attached to it. On the middle of the charms there’s a compass star, and on the other two what look like coordinates.

“Where we met, and where we’re going,” Niall says when Louis looks up at him with the question obvious in his eyes.

The only thing Louis can think is how lovely it is. Such a small item, with so much meaning in it. Niall holds his hand out again, this time with his palm facing up so Louis can easily see the matching bracelet in his hand. One for each of them. It’s such a nice gift, and Louis carefully wraps it around his wrist and locks it into place.

“That’s the sappiest shit I’ve ever heard, lad,” he says, but there’s no bite behind the words at all.

Niall just shrugs, an easy grin forming on his face. He puts on his own bracelet, with a lot less care than Louis did. When Niall starts the car, Louis can’t help but run his fingers over the leather strap.

¤¤¤

The GPS breaks down after two days on the road. Niall laughs and refuses to hand over his phone when Louis asks. Says that it’s gonna be an adventure and that it’ll be fun. Louis doesn’t find it quite as amusing, but he doesn’t fight Niall either. 

It doesn’t take long before Louis loses count on how many times they get lost after that. Mostly because Niall convinces him to take all the small roads instead of the motorway like he’s done so far when he could get away with it. It’s nice, and Louis finds that he doesn’t mind being lost much when he isn’t alone about having to find the way.

¤¤¤

Having Niall along in the car is basically having his very own live concert at any given moment. He sings along to the radio whenever he knows the song that’s playing, and when he gets tired of not knowing any songs for long enough then he unbuckles his seatbelt to be able to reach back in the car for his guitar without Louis having to pull over. He almost gives Louis a heart attack the first time he does it because he accidentally kicks Louis in the gut which results in the car wavering until he gets it back under control. Niall’s a lot more careful when he does it now.

His guitar playing is amazing. Niall tells him the story of how his big brother had gotten a small guitar when they were kids but never had started to use it. Eventually, Niall had gotten curious enough to pick it up himself and with the help of YouTube started to learn how to play it. Louis is dead impressed with how far he’s come with YouTube tutorials and determination.

Sometimes he just plays the guitar, and others he sings along to the song he’s playing. Most of the time Louis’ got no idea what the song is, but it doesn’t really matter either way because it all sounds lovely.

“You know Wonderwall?” Niall asks and starts strumming the chords.

Louis rolls his eyes and groans, because really? “Isn’t that like the first and only song literally everyone will be able to learn to play on guitar?”

That has Niall howling in laughter, and his fingers stop for a second moving against the strings.

“No, shut up for a second. I like Oasis just fine, don’t get me wrong, but that literally the most cliché thing ever.”

Niall just proceeds to very dramatically start playing the song once again, and Louis can’t quite stop the smile from showing on his face.

“Alright, give me a song you can sing then?”

His first reaction is to just shake his head, tell Niall no, but why the hell not? Even if Niall ends up laughing at him, then he literally laughs at anything and everything, so who even cares? Maybe Louis a little bit. 

“I don’t know. Like most things with The Fray, or Green Day, or something like that.” He says it with a shrug, not really caring much at all what Niall chooses to play. Half wishes that maybe he just won’t play anything at all if Louis doesn’t mention any song in particular.

Niall just lights up, though. He moves his fingers over the guitar without playing it, as if to remember the chords. “How did it go again?” he mutters, and then plays a few wacky notes before nodding to himself and starts up on a melody Louis is able to recognise quite easily.

“ _Step one, you say we need to talk_ ,” Niall starts singing, opening _How to Save a Life_ beautifully. He sings the next line as well, all while encouraging Louis to join in.

Louis does, all while making silly faces and his voice funny. It’s easier to make a fool out of himself on purpose than it is to just fail because he sucks at it. It makes Niall laugh like he planned for it to do, but the other boy also looks somewhat disappointed, so when the song lacks towards the end, he drops the façade and lets his voice be its very own wonky self. Niall seems pleased, though, so Louis still preens once the song is over. He still just shakes his head when Niall tries to convince him for another song. Tells him he likes it much better when Niall just sings for him, like the shining star that he is. Louis has never seen anyone blush that much before in his life, and he finds that he wants that to happen all the time.

¤¤¤

They can’t find anywhere to sleep that night, and eventually, Louis suggests that they should just sleep in the car. Niall agrees easily enough, though it turns out not to be the easiest thing to fall asleep like that. It’s a bit like being a kid again, falling asleep in the back seat of the car while he parents were driving them home after a long day out. It lacks the safeness that comes with rocking back and forth as the car drives, and now Louis is mostly left in an uncomfortable position, curled up in the driver’s seat.

He opens his eyes and blinks over at Niall when the other boy starts giggling quietly.

“What?”

Niall shakes his head, and just whispers back a, “Nothing, don’t worry about it.”

It doesn’t take long, though, before Niall gently shakes his arm. Louis doesn’t mind much since he wasn’t even close to being able to sleep either way.

“Wanna cuddle in the back seat and watch a movie on my phone?”

And that is most definitely the best offer Louis has gotten in days, so he doesn’t even hesitate to nod. Within a few minutes, they’re both comfortably curled around each other. Niall’s got his head rested on Louis’ chest, and his hair tickles the tip of Louis’ nose, which probably is his own fault because Niall’s hair still smells soapy from the shower he took at the motel this morning.

It seems so easy all of a sudden for his eyes to fall shut, to the quiet sound of the movie, and the warmth of Niall’s body against his own.

¤¤¤

Niall laughs and points out the window to where a couple of teens have set up on the pavement with instruments laid out in their laps.  A guitar, a keyboard and something that looks like a makeshift drum are in the laps of the three boys, and the girl is sitting between the lot of them emptyhanded. “Stop the car, Lou!” he says excitedly, almost bouncing in his seat.

Louis rolls his eyes but does park the car behind another one a couple of yards away from the teens. The car has barely stopped before Niall has grabbed his guitar and is out of the door. Louis follows a bit slower, but he still hears how Niall approaches the teens and asks if they’d mind him joining for a song. It’s unbelievable how easy Niall makes it. How within seconds he’s a part of the group jamming along to some song Louis doesn’t even know. The girl who’s singing keeps catching Niall’s eyes and he keeps making silly faces at her. It fucks the song up a bit because she keeps forgetting where she’s at in the song, and in the end, she almost falls over in laughter clutching her stomach. All four teens seem to be dying in laughter as Niall wriggles his eyebrows at them with a smirk and plays a funny melody on the guitar.

Louis settles down on the ground beside Niall, as he figures they probably won’t be leaving just yet. He’s proved right a couple of minutes later.

“You guys know any of the good old stuff?” Niall asks when everyone seems to have calmed down once again. Immediately everyone is babbling each trying to be heard over the other. Louis can’t really make sense of anything being said, but Niall nods along to everything, lights up at some point and just like that they seem to have come to an agreement.

Normally Louis’ go to music wouldn’t exactly be ‘the good old stuff’ as Niall put it, but he still immediately recognises the Eagles song when the five of them starts playing. This time Niall sings along with the girl, his voice blending in with the girl’s effortlessly. Louis isn’t surprised anymore by how lovely his voice is, but his breath still hitches slightly, and he partly wants to watch Niall forever and ever and partly close his eyes and just let his voice in without any distractions.

“Duuuude!” the girl grins once the song is over, pulling out the vowel excessively. She goes in for a high five and Niall meets her hand seconds later. “That’s some good shit right there!”

“Right back at ya!” Niall laughs, clearly enjoying himself fully.

It’s so easy to see how this is exactly what Niall is meant to be doing. Louis can’t see any other life for him. The music just fits so easily with him. Louis doesn’t know if Niall is ever going to get like the big artists, but he does know that he definitely will be something, even if that’s just someone street performing for people’s enjoyment.

They play some more songs together, shifting between the genres like they don’t even exist. Sometimes Niall sings along, and with some of the songs, it’s just the girl's voice filling the air. Niall even tries to get Louis to sing along, but he just shakes his head stubbornly until Niall lets go of the idea.

By the fifth song, they’ve gathered a small crowd around them who cheer and claps every time a song ends. At some point, a young girl asks if they can do a Justin Bieber song and before anyone can react Niall has jumped to his feet, strums the guitar and starts serenading the girl. She hides her face when he blows her a kiss, but Niall just finishes the song with a laugh in his voice. A couple of sentences in the band joins the song, finishing with him.

“Thank you,” the girl whispers, and kisses Niall on the cheek. He bows for her, and Louis isn’t sure how she’s still standing on her feet. The attention isn’t even focused on Louis, and he feels a bit faint watching them.

“You’re a right flirt,” Louis mutters when Niall finds his way back to sit beside him.

“Just wanted to make her day,” Niall says back, sounding so genuine. It’s stupidly cute, and really no one should be allowed to be like that. How is Louis supposed to deal with that?

They only play a couple of songs more before the girl says that they’ll have to leave. 

“Thanks…” she hesitates, apparently realising she doesn’t even know his name.

“Niall,” Niall supplies easily.

“Thanks, Niall. This was so cool. Wait a moment, will you?” she asks and scrambles through her backpack until she finds a notebook and a pen. She hands it over to Niall who takes it with a confused expression on his face. “Sign that for me? For when you get famous once?”

Her words just make Niall laugh good-heartedly as he shakes his head in disbelief. He still dots something down on the page, and Louis catches a glimpse of the scrawled words. _Thanks for the jam. Keep being wonderful. Love Niall Horan._

“You’ll all have to sign one for me too then,” Niall insists when he hands back the notebook. They agree easily enough and laughs all the way when they pass the notebook around all writing on a fresh page. _Shirley, Andrew, Matt, Ash._ And then underneath all their names is written _, better send us your album once it’s done!_

They part way after that, the four teens moving the opposite way as Niall and Louis make their way back to the car. Niall hides the paper with all their names away in the bag for his guitar, and Louis loves how he doesn’t even hesitate to keep it. The guitar follows back into the bag, and Niall finds his way onto the front seat. He sighs contently and closes his eyes once he’s in. Louis’ heart might skip a beat or two.

He wants to kiss him. Wants to kiss his stupid face and feel the way he laughs into the kiss because Louis just knows that he would.

Louis turns on the car and starts driving.

¤¤¤

“What are you doing?” Louis asks, looking over at Niall when he settles back into his seat after having reached for something in his bag on the back seat. He’s got a small notebook in his hands that looks years old and well used. There’s a pen stuck on the front cover of it by the clip.

Niall ignores him and opens the book on a blank page. He fiddles with the pen and bites down on one end of it for a second before he lights up. He scribbles something down on the page. His tongue is poked out in concentration, and he’s not even glancing up at Louis for minutes.

“Niall,” he says, trying to catch his attention, while also trying to get a glimpse of what he’s writing down on the page. It’s hard while he also has to keep an eye on the road, but Louis is curious. For a short second, he’s seriously considering pulling over the car just to be able to have a peak.

He pouts over at Niall when the other barely seems to notice Louis is talking to him. Louis is not sure what’s worst, Niall ignoring him on purpose, or him just not noticing.

“Niall!”

Finally, he gets Niall’s attention, but only to get hushed and then ignored once again. Well fine then! It takes a couple of minutes more before Niall looks up at Louis with a bright smile. “Sorry, I just needed to get something down before I forgot. I’m all yours now,” he grins and clips the pen to the top of the page and closes the notebook.

“Getting what down?”

Niall flushes and bites his lip, but Louis just raises his eyebrow and waits for the answer. Eventually, he gets one. “Um, lyrics? I want to write my own songs, not just sing someone else’s, you know?”

Louis nods, because it makes sense and to encourage Niall in case he wants to go on. Niall stays awfully quiet.

“So, let me hear?”

“They're not that great and I’ve not got mu…”

“Neil, the lyrics, now please,” he interrupts with a roll of his eyes.

It’s with a sulking expression that Niall finds the page once again. He looks up at Louis unsurely, but Louis just smiles at him in encouragement. Silently telling him that, no, he won’t laugh or make fun of him no matter what. It seems to be enough because Niall takes a deep breath and nods.

 _“Standing here on my own_  
_Yeah, the first step’s the hardest when you’re walking into the unknown_  
 _It’s been dark, and it’s been cold_  
 _Had my heads in the clouds, never knowing what lies down below,_ ” he starts singing, the melody a bit rocky still, but Louis definitely gets the idea of how the song will form out melody vice. He waits for Niall to continue, but he just shrugs when Louis looks over at him. He’s not got any more right now then.

“ _Niall,”_ he breathes out. “Why haven’t you told me you wrote before? That’s great so far! Will you sing it to me when you finish it?”

“I… yeah, I will,” Niall says, and it only takes a short glance over at him to see how his ears seem to have gotten pinker, and how shy his smile is.

“Good, can’t wait for it to be done. Can’t wait for the world to hear how talented you are either.”

Niall hits him lightly on the shoulder, seeming unable to come up with a response, so Louis lets it go for now, and instead scolds him loudly and dramatically about hitting while Louis is driving, and that they could have very well _died._ Niall’s choking on laughter through the whole thing, and Louis can barely keep his face serious either.

¤¤¤

Sometimes Niall drives, and Louis’ got his feet carelessly thrown on top of the dashboard, dangling right in front of the windscreen. Other times Louis drives, and Niall sings and plays the guitar for him, or he tells stories and talks about music. Niall’s a lot more vocal when he isn’t the one driving, and Louis finds that he doesn’t mind driving most of the time just to hear his voice a little more than he otherwise would have.

¤¤¤

The bed bounces underneath him when Niall throws himself down on the madras beside him.  Louis almost drops Niall’s phone which he’d currently been watching some movie Niall had on his iTunes while waiting for the other boy. Luckily, he catches the small device before it ends up on the bed, or worse broken on the floor.

He’s freshly out of the shower, and his wet hair tickles Louis’ neck when Niall rest his head on his shoulder. He smells a lot better than any of them have for days, but Louis supposes that’s what happens when you sleep in the car a few days in a row.

For a while, they both just watch the movie, though Louis has a hard time concentrating with Niall lying this close to him. Especially when he cuddles closer and wraps his arms around Louis. There’s no way he could ever ask Niall to move away though. He enjoys it a lot more than he’s willing to admit to anyone, even himself.

“We should go out,” Niall murmurs, eyes locked on the screen. He sounds absentminded like he’s barely noticing himself what he’s saying.

“Where to?” Louis asks with a frown. It’s not that he’s opposed to the idea in general, but he is opposed to having to get up from the bed and not being able to cuddle into him like this anymore.

Niall finally looks away from the movie and twists his whole body so he’s able to smile up at Louis. His eyes seem almost sleepy, and all Louis wants to do is to casually suggest that maybe they just stay in for the night.  For Niall’s sake of course. Louis is totally up for going out.

“I saw this bar a couple of streets down when we drove here. There was a sign that said it was open mic night. Thought it could be fun, yeah?”

The smile he sends Niall is very much put up, and had it been anyone else in this world asking him to go sing karaoke at some bar then he’d probably have killed them. Instead, Louis’ head starts nodding before he can stop himself. _Why, why, why?_ The way Niall’s face lights up like Louis just promised him the moon and the stars instead of agreeing to go to open mic night is exactly why. It seems like there’s very little Louis wouldn’t do for Niall to look at him like that.

Niall pushes Louis towards the bathroom with a laughing command of getting washed up so they can leave already. Louis stumbles over his own feet and curses himself far away through the whole shower. Eventually, he gets back out in his cleanest outfit, which really, the cleanness is quite questionable. He does feel a lot better after having stood under the warm water for a while.

When he gets out there, Niall’s hair is put up in a quiff and he’s already got his shoes on. He’s bouncing back and forth on his feet, excitement clear on his face. It’s disgustingly adorable. Louis has got shoes thrown at him before he can even make a move to get them himself, though he does react fast enough to not get hit by the flying objects.

“Niall!” he tries to scold, but it’s ruined when he can’t hold on to the serious face and instead breaks into a fit of laughter.

Niall just pouts at him in return, so Louis puts on his shoes still laughing. A warm hand takes his own, and he’s being pulled along. It’s obvious that Niall’s got a goal in his mind and that he remembers the way because he doesn’t hesitate at all. Had Louis not known better then he’d probably have thought that Niall had been there a thousand times before.

Turns out the bar is quite decent sized, and it’s easy enough getting in even though they do have to stand in line for a bit.

The first thing Louis notices when he gets inside is how supportive most people in there are of the act on stage. It’s two young girls who’re singing to each other and dancing around just having fun. They’re not bad, but nothing remarkable either. Still, though, then everyone’s clapping along and cheering.

Niall grins back at him and grabs Louis’ hand to drag him closer to the small stage. Louis doesn’t really know what to do with his hands once Niall drops it again as soon as they reach the stage. Luckily the two girls finish their song, so Louis starts clapping, as Niall cheers loudly. He’s got so much support for anyone in him, and Louis can’t help but think back on one of their first days together when Niall had gotten so surprised that Louis actually believed in him and his dreams. He’s giving so much of what he’s never gotten much of himself. All Louis wants is for Niall to get all the support in the world, and for people to believe just as much in him as Louis does.

The next act quickly gets ready, and as soon as the lad starts singing Louis just knows that there isn’t much future for the lad with music. Amazingly that doesn’t stop the crowd from having the best of times. The song’s a bit more upbeat this time, and a couple of people starts dancing. Louis can’t even bring himself to complain when Niall starts swinging him around to the beat of the music. He does some funny moves and almost falls over his own feet, which just makes it impossible for Louis to not tumble over in laughter.

“Promise me you won’t dance when you get famous!” Louis yells over the music, and Niall puts on the biggest pout in return.

“Excuse me, I’m great!” He goes to prove his point by making a pirouette, but he fails miserably. Luckily Louis reacts quick enough to keep him on his feet when he almost faceplants the floor.

“Great at a lot of things, but not dancing, lad.”

“Shut it, like you’re any better,” Niall laughs in return, though Louis is faintly able to see the light blush that colours his skin.

Louis just laughs with a shrug because it’s true. Still, they spent the next couple of hours just dancing around to the different acts that are up on the stage playing and singing. Most of the songs are fun and upbeat, and they’re easy to dance to. At the slower ones, Niall leads Louis around in what in some universe could maybe have been called an interpretation of a waltz, trying to be all serious faced but failing badly. Louis wants to scold him for being an idiot, but he’s too busy keeping up with every step Niall takes and with laughing as Niall sticks his tongue out in concentration.

He’s having so much more fun than he had thought he’d have while they were still back at the hotel. The open mic thing is barely present in his mind as he’s too busy concentrating on Niall. He doesn’t even question it when Niall disappears just to join him again a short while later with drinks in his hands for the two of them.

Louis finds them a table so they won’t have to worry about spilling their drinks over some unlucky person. The floor is a hazard with all the people dancing around. Sliding in on one side of the table, Louis expects Niall to sit on the other side, but instead, he makes Louis move over so he can sit beside him. Easily Louis turns his whole body towards Niall. The other lad’s face is flushed, a nice pink colour replacing the usual pale skin.

They just talk, switching from one topic to the other in an easy flow. There’s never any awkward pauses or silences with Niall. Louis enjoys himself just as much just sitting there with the other boy as he did when they were dancing around earlier. They quickly get slightly tipsier as well, each taking turns to get them new drinks when they run out.

It’s late in the evening when Louis is interrupted in the middle of a sentence, as both his own and Niall’s name is being called out from the stage. It’s announced who the girl on stage is and that the two of them will be up for the next song. There are more people in here than there was when they got here, and for a second Louis closes his eyes and prays that by some weird coincidence that there’s another Niall and Louis there tonight.

His dream is crushed when Niall excitedly turns to the stage, and without hesitation gets up from his seat.

“C’mon, Lou!” he exclaims, eyes bright as he holds out his hand for Louis to take.

“Oh, no,” Louis says, pushing himself further away from Niall until he’s sitting with his back against the wall. “I’m not going up there!”

“Why not?” Niall asks as a frown takes over his face.

_Because you’re lovely, and I’m me. Because I’m not brave like you._

“I’m no singer, that’s why,” Louis says tamely. He avoids looking at Niall’s face because he just knows that the frown has become deeper and that his eyes have gone soft. Louis’ not sure when Niall’s face became so familiar to him. A little over a week ago they were strangers, but now he can predict almost every expression the boy makes. He doesn’t look at Niall, because he knows that he’ll end up giving in, and that terrifies him.

“Lou.” Fingers find his chin, and Louis is forced to look up at Niall. Niall’s eyes search his own and he must find something he doesn’t like because he pulls Louis in for a hug. Louis buries his face in Niall’s shirt, breathing in the smell of him, a little sweaty and smelling like someone’s spilt alcohol on him at some point through the night, but still so much like _Niall._ “You don’t have to go up there if you don’t want to. I’ve heard you sing in the car, though, and you’ve got a lovely voice. I’d really like you to come up there with me, but I won’t force you into anything.”

His voice is so gentle and soft, and Louis’ defence kinda just breaks, just like he knew it would.

“We don’t even have a song or anything,” he mutters into Niall’s shoulder. “This is a _terrible_ idea, Niall.”

“Of course, it’s not. We’ll do the one we sang in the car. You seemed to know the words for that just fine.”

“Yes, when I was just singing along!” Louis protests.

“Don’t worry you won’t be alone up there. We have to hurry now. She’s almost done with her song, and then it’s our turn. C’mon,” he says again, and this time Louis doesn’t try to flee, and instead, Louis reluctantly lets Niall drag him along to the side of the stage.

The man who had called on them hands over a guitar to Niall. It doesn’t look as nice as Niall’s own guitar, but Louis supposes that it’ll be just fine for just one song either way.

The girl on stage finishes her song, and the man walks up there to introduce them and call for the next act to get ready. Niall fiddles with the guitar while they wait as if to check if everything is alright. The brightest smile turns up on his face when it’s their turn to walk up on stage. It’s barely one; mostly just a platform raised a little over floor height.

Niall looks right in his element as he greets the crowd and gets a couple of drunken cheers in return. There are two mics up there, and Niall takes place behind the one furthest away from them, and unsurely Louis stands behind the other.

After glancing over at Louis, and getting a hesitant nod as a go-ahead, Niall starts playing the first chords in the song. Louis feels frozen and he’s not sure he’ll ever be able to find his voice. Luckily Niall doesn’t seem to expect him to leap into singing just yet, because he starts singing the first line of the song without pausing.

Niall sings with his eyes closed, focusing entirely on the music. The first line turns into him finishes the entire first verse, and then he leaps directly into the chorus. Louis bites his lip, but then he somehow convinces himself to open his mouth and join in. His voice sounds a bit rusty like it hasn’t been used in ages, but surprisingly it blends in quite nicely with Niall’s voice. He meets Niall’s eyes, which must have opened when Louis started singing, and Niall smiles at him proudly. It’s enough to give him the courage to take the second verse on his own. His stomach flutters when Niall’s voice joins back in with his own once it’s over. Louis understands why Niall had his eyes closed then. There’s something about just giving in to the music. It’s easier as well, finishes of the song with Niall when he doesn’t have to look at the crowd.

The cheers are loud when Niall sings the last line of the song. Louis’ eyes widen with how loud the crowd is being. His hands shake a bit, so he twists his fingers into the fabric of his shirt for it not to be too obvious.

“Thank you all for listening, and a special thanks to my amazing friend here who did this just for me. Let’s give him a cheer,” Niall says into the mic, and for whatever reason, a lot of people chooses to entertain him and do as asked. It’s thrilling, but also makes Louis’ heart beat a little faster and his breath catch in his throat.

Niall comes over to him and takes his hand. When he bows for the crowd, Louis automatically follows his movement. They get a last round of claps and someone even whistles after them as they jump down from the stage.

Louis’ somewhat grateful when Niall leaves his side for a moment as he has to turn back the guitar. It gives Louis enough time to take a deep breath and take in that they really just did that. His blood sings, and he just feels so alive. When Niall comes back to him, Niall’s smile matches his own.

“Let’s get out of here,” Niall says, and he doesn’t even have to offer his hand for Louis to take it so they won’t get lost from each other as they make their way outside.

He doesn’t get to hold Niall’s hand for long, because as soon as they’re out of the bar, Niall lets go.

“We should start a band,” he exclaims excitedly, and clearly still pumped. They’ve just barely left the club, and Niall’s whole body seems to be vibrating. He’s almost dancing down the pavement, not being able to stand still. The amount of energy he’s got is quite amazing.

“Oh, should we now?” Louis asks and rolls his eyes.

Niall abruptly stops a couple of steps in front of Louis and turns around to face him. It forces Louis to stop as well. It’s with big motions of his arms that he continues. “No, but imagine! We’d probably end up in a boy band or something! There’d be Harrison; a total goof and believed to be frontman even though there wouldn’t really be one. There’d be Leeroy, who’d be the dad of the band, though we’d totally end up corrupting him and he’d be as silly as the rest. And there’d be Zack; the mysterious one who’d leave us all a couple of years in because we were no longer cool enough, and R&B is much better than pop tunes.”

Louis raises an eyebrow, amused, to say the least.

“And where would that leave us then?” he can’t help but ask.

“The heart and the soul,” Niall says dreamingly and sends Louis that smile that never seems to leave his face. It’s a good thing Louis doesn’t want it too either.

“Nah, that’s your dream,” Louis murmurs, though he does quite like the sound of that. Being the heart and soul alongside Niall seems like the best thing in the world. Though just being with Niall is just as great, and he doesn’t need any fame for that.

“What’s your dream then, Lou?” And honestly, Louis wishes he knew.

¤¤¤

Louis’ feet dangle a couple of inches from the ground. He feels short sitting on the hood of the car, but there’s a certain joy when he notices that Niall can’t touch the ground with his feet either, so at least he’s not the only one.

It feels too early to be up, and Niall was only able to coax him out of bed because of the delicious smell of greasy fast-food. They didn’t drink nearly enough last night for him to really have a hangover, but his head still feels a bit too sensitive with the early morning light and the noise from the cars that are already on the road.

He uses his shoulder to knock into Niall’s, only to get a raised brow and an amused smile in return.

“You should swap food with me,” he says, eying the chips Niall’s got lying on the hood beside him.

“You haven’t got anything to swap,” Niall laughs, which is true because Louis had munched down his own food already and for once actually succeeded to be done before Niall.

“So?”

He stares daringly at Niall, waiting for him to tell him to fuck off. Louis would certainly have done so, but Niall just shrugs and then eventually moves the chips over on the other side of him, so Louis can reach as well.

Happily, Louis takes a couple, keeping in mind not to eat all of them so Niall can have some as well. Sharing is caring after all. Louis makes sure to tell Niall that as well, just because he knows he’ll get a laugh in return.

¤¤¤

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Niall asks frown becoming impossibly deeper for every second that passes.

He’s nervously twitching around in the chair he’s sitting in, and all Louis wants to do is laugh at him for being silly. After all, then it’s Louis who’s going to go under the needle as soon as the tattoo artist is done setting up for him.

“Lad, it’s not the first time I’ve been inked. You make it sound like I’m gonna die,” Louis says, and he isn’t quite able to hide the laugh in his voice.

Niall’s frown turns into a pout immediately. He murmurs something where Louis only hears the word ‘infection’, so he supposes that Niall’s trying to defend himself. Louis almost misses the next part as well, but Niall must have spoken a little louder. “I’m afraid of needles. I’m probably gonna pass out.”

There’s no way out of the laugh this time, though he almost feels bad with the expression he gets in return. It hits him hard right then how much he wants to kiss the pout of Niall’s face, and how much he wants to hold his hands, so they stop fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

He starts reaching out, not quite able to stop himself when the tattoo artist enters the room and asks him to come with. Instead of taking Niall’s hand in his own, he lets his knuckle touch Niall’s shoulder. It’s so much softer than it would have been had it been any of Louis’ friends back home.

“Good thing they’re not putting any needles in you then,” he whispers teasingly, as he gets up. He offers his hand to help Niall up as well, though if he’d rather stay here and wait then he won’t force him to come with inside.

For a moment Niall just looks at him. He hesitates long enough that Louis starts pulling his hand back, though before he can do so Niall finally takes it. Louis smiles and drags him with him into the room the tattoo artist disappeared into.

Louis falls into the chair, and a bit more slowly then Niall takes a seat beside Louis on the side the tattoo artist isn’t, so he won’t be in the way. The man shows Louis the design, and Louis happily shows him exactly where he wants the tattoo.

As the low buzz starts, Louis relaxes into the chair. He doesn’t wince when the needle touches his skin, but Niall does. When Louis looks up at him, he’s looking a bit queasy and won’t look directly at the needle.

“You gonna pass out on me?” he asks, eyes crinkling up in a laugh.

“Shut up!” Niall grumbles, but when Louis a bit hesitantly reaches out, then Niall immediately puts his hand in Louis’. Louis gently squeezes it and then starts distracting Niall by talking about footie.

The buzzing keeps going for a while longer, and eventually, Niall stops looking like Louis’ dragged him to his worst nightmare, and more like he’s just enjoying being there with Louis. Louis hopes so at least because there’s no one Louis would have rather had there at that moment.

“All done,” the tattoo artist says and starts whipping of the leftover ink from Louis’ arm.

Louis hops off the chair and walks over to the mirror hanging on the wall by the door. On his bicep in an old typewriter kind of style is two words formed out.

“Far away,” Niall says, hooking his chin on Louis’ shoulder so they both can look at the tattoo in the mirror.

“Far away,” Louis repeats, a little smile toying on his lips. He meets Niall’s eyes in the mirror, and there’s so much warmth in those eyes.

He’s so far away from home, so far away from all the people that mattered the most to him, and so far away from a future he didn’t want. He misses home all the time, but he’s also found a new home in the boy behind him, and hopefully a future that’ll be good for both of them. Louis thinks that’s so much better than the future his parents had planned for him.

“Like we wanted.” The words are soft-spoken, and Louis can easily hear the content in Niall’s voice as he says them. There’s the distant memory of Niall telling him he wanted to get far away as they were closing in on London. Back when Louis had thought he would stay there, and not flee to the other end of the world with the boy.

“Yeah,” he agrees, and it’s easy like that when Niall just smiles at him like they’re the only two people in the room.

¤¤¤

 _Goddammit_! Louis desperately tries to catch sight of a sign that’ll tell them where they are, but there’s _nothing._ Niall’s just crackling as Louis grumbles and curses under his breath. He’s been sitting on his phone for the last hour, ever since Louis tried to steal it.

“Just give me the damn phone!” he pouts when the road splits in three, still no clear sign of what way to go.

“Nope.”

“Why’ve you got to be like this?!”

Niall just shrugs, not giving any verbal answer, but Louis can still hear the ‘because it’s more fun this way, an adventure’, that he’s thinking.

“Fine, pick a bloody direction then!”

Niall loses his breath from laughter, and eventually, Louis gets enough and picks a direction on his own. Who even fricking cares if they end up back in New York? It’ll all be Niall’s fault then, and Louis is totally gonna be the smuggest bastard when it happens.

¤¤¤

Louis parks the car a little away from the road, hidden by a small group of trees that’ll shadow at least a bit for the morning sun. He’s got no idea how close they are to the next city, but either way, then they’re running short on money and shouldn’t waste them on another motel night. God, he wants to, though. A shower would be nice, and goddammit he misses his bed back home.

He glances over at Niall who looks way too awake for this time of the night. Louis supposes that’s what happens when he lets the other lad nap through the whole day. It’s hard to try and tell him not to when Niall had pouted at him every time he tried to make him wake up.

“I’m knackered,” Louis yawns and stretches his body as well as possible in the restrained space.

“Want me to drive for a bit?” Niall asks quietly.

For a short moment, Louis is really tempted to take the offer, just so they could get a little closer to the goal. Niall driving through the night, though, also means that he’s too tired to stay awake in the morning, and Louis wants as much time with him as possible. He’s cute when he sleeps, head resting against the window, feet only a few inches from touching Louis’ leg even though he’s curled together on the seat. When he’s awake, though, he’s so vibrant, so alive, all big smiles and laughs, and Louis just can’t get enough of him. Not sure he’ll ever be able to get enough.

“Nah, you should try to sleep. It won’t make much difference anyway.”

Niall nods, but he still doesn’t really look like someone who’s ready to fall asleep just yet. He’s twitchy in his seat, but Louis ignores him and curls together on the seat and closes his eyes. Just needs a bit of sleep. Even in the uncomfortable position, he’s got no doubts that he’ll be asleep within a minute or two. Driving all day long is tiring. Especially because the sun’s been staring him right in the face all day, the warmth driving him crazy. He’s not sure he’s gonna be much of an LA person. He likes that the weather in England allows him to wear an oversized hoodie and a pair of joggers.

On the brink of falling asleep Louis feels something touch his arm carefully and then shaking him. Maybe if he ignores it ’ll go away.

“Louis?” Niall whispers with a quiet laugh. “I don’t think I can fall asleep yet.”

“Your problem,” Louis mutters, not even bothering to open his eyes. “Sleep.”

“Wake up!” he then starts whining, and Louis takes everything back. He’s much cuter when he’s sleeping than when he’s awake. Terrible awake kind of person.

The shaking in his arm become less gentle, and Niall is laughing full blown as he keeps jostling Louis and as Louis keeps trying to ignore him the best he can. This is just rude! It’s Louis who’s been driving all day! It’s Louis who made sure they got any further on their trip! Niall’s just been napping! Louis needs his nap too.

At a last attempt to ignore Niall and fall asleep, Louis turns around in his seat so he’s facing the door. If the problem is out of sight, it’s out of mind. Not mattering much that Louis had his eyes closed before as well, but whatever. For a second it seems to work. The shaking stops and Louis sighs contently. That’s it until the sigh abruptly turns into a squeal when he’s full on attacked.

Niall’s fingers dig into his sides tickling him. Louis thinks he’s going to die. He can’t breathe right and just tries to fight his way away from Niall’s awful fingers, all while squeal after squeal leaves him.

“Niiiaaaaaall,” he whines, trying to push his hands away.

Just like that, Niall pulls away. He looks at him a little breathless. Funnily enough, then Niall seems just as out of breath as Louis is himself. He’s also flushed a soft red from his cheeks all down his neck.

“Go watch the stars with me?”

“What?” Louis asks. He blinks slowly, not entirely processing his words.

“C’mon,” Niall just says, opening the car door in the progress. He’s outside before Louis’ mind can quite catch up with everything.

Niall knocks on the window and makes a silly face when he catches Louis’ eyes. Louis wants to roll his eyes out of principle, but it doesn’t feel quite right when he can’t whip off the fond smile on his lips. It takes a moment for him to convince himself that he shouldn’t just try to sleep once again, but Niall doesn’t seem ready to let him just yet, and he supposes as sooner he gives in, the sooner Niall will let him sleep without disturbing him.

With that as his reasoning, Louis finally follows Niall outside in the night air. Compared to how light it was outside earlier, it’s impossibly dark now. The moon is almost full, and the sky is clear from clouds, though, so it makes everything seem a little lighter.

Niall takes Louis’ hand as soon as he gets within his reach. He’s pulling Louis along without a word. Louis doesn’t question him, as he mostly just seems to want to get away from the trees where he can see the stars a bit better.

It turns out that he’s right. Niall settles down on the ground as soon as he’s in the clear from the trees. Louis wants to complain about having to sit on the dirt. There aren’t even any patches of grass that they can sit on. His trousers are going to be dirty, and it’s not like he’s got any clean clothes any more, or the money to go buy some more. This whole trip has pretty much emptied his account by now, and they still need to have enough money to settle down in LA. In the end, he doesn’t say anything. He’s not sure when he became such a pushover. He reckons that he probably wouldn’t be for many other people than the lad sitting beside him.

“I wanted to be an astronaut when I was little,” Niall says, looking up at the stars. Louis can’t quite make his eyes move from Niall to look at the sky as well. Louis hums, encouraging him to keep going without saying anything. “I wanted to go visit all the stars and all the planets, and then I was going to fight aliens. The hero of the universe.” He laughs and meets Louis’ eyes. His face is crinkled up in a warm smile, and yet again Louis wants to do nothing but to kiss him.

“Then you got a bum knee and decided to pursue music instead?” Louis asks teasingly.

“No. My parents wanted me to study business, and one day be able to take over theirs. They’ve never really been very supportive of any of the things I wanted with my life, as they’ve always got their own plans for me. Music has always been a way to escape, you know? I love it with all my heart, and it’s something I’ll never be bored of. Being an astronaut just kind of seemed to dim a bit compared to making music. Got a friend who works for NASA, though, so that’s pretty cool.”

“You’ve got a friend working for NASA?!” Louis asks, eyes becoming wide. He kinda wants to poke at the other part, about his parents, but Louis isn’t ready to share everything about his own so it doesn’t seem fair expecting answers from Niall. “Leave it to you to befriend fucking NASA.”

“Shut up.” There’s no heat behind the words, but Louis still sees how Niall rolls his eyes. Oh god no, Louis is rubbing off on him. “More like a friendly acquaintance than anything. My parents took me to visit there a couple of years ago, and this older scientist was kind enough to show us around and tell us everything we could possibly want to know. We e-mail occasionally,” he says with a shrug, but even in the dark, Louis can see the slight blush covering his cheeks.

He decides not to tease, because really, it’s quite cool. “Tell me about space?” he asks, so of course Niall doesn’t hesitate to do so. He starts out talking about the stars and then drifts over to planets and galaxies. Louis blinks to keep his eyes open and fights to keep his head straight up. Every part of his body is heavy with hours of being awake. Eventually, he can’t keep his head up, and without thinking he rests it against Niall’s shoulder.

Niall stumbles over a word, but then rapidly proceeds to continue telling Louis about his visit at NASA. It’s easy being lulled into sleep with Niall’s voice in his ear. Louis doesn’t understand everything he’s saying, and the words blend together until the only thing Louis can really concentrate on is the excitement in everything Niall says.

“Louis, look!” Niall suddenly interrupts himself. Louis startles a little from where he was halfway to sleep with his head on Niall’s shoulder. Niall points towards the sky, and when Louis looks up he sees a shooting star making its way across the sky. It’s beautiful. “Make a wish.” The words are a whisper, quiet and in awe.

 _I wish that it’ll just be you and I forever,_ Louis sleepily thinks to himself. The shock from the startle is gone and everything that’s left is the exhaustion. He places his head back on Niall’s shoulder and falls asleep just like that.

¤¤¤

Louis can’t keep his eyes away from Niall. He’s never been more grateful when Niall had said he’d drive for a while. None of them is talking, Niall just softly humming, as he concentrates on the road. Every once in a while, Niall looks over at him and meets Louis’ eyes, but he can’t really bring himself to care that he’s been caught staring.

Niall doesn’t call him out on it either, so Louis just rests his head against the seat with his whole body turned towards the other, smiling softly as he watches every little movement Niall makes.

¤¤¤

His whole body is light with laughter. He has a hard time concentrating on the road, as Niall keeps telling him one stupid joke after the other. They’re not even funny, but Louis still can’t help but laugh. Not when Niall is huddled over the seat having a hard time breathing because he’s choking on laughter himself. Louis loves how even the smallest thing seems like the brightest and the funniest in Niall’s eyes. He loves how Niall’s a silly idiot who laughs at his own lame jokes. He loves the way his whole body is a part of the laugh as if to let every single little part of him feel the joy.

“I love you,” Louis blurts out because somehow, he can’t not tell Niall that. It feels so important for the other boy to know. His face still becomes warm, and without a doubt stupidly flushed. Well, that’s certainly one way to scare someone away _. Nicely done, Tomlinson_ , he can’t help but think, and mentally rolls his eyes at himself.

He bites his lip and can’t quite make himself look over at Niall. Niall has stopped laughing but is still heavily breathing. Louis can’t help but imagine all the ways Niall can turn him down. Maybe gently, maybe while looking at Louis like he’s ruined their friendship, or maybe with a laugh like he thinks Louis is joking. That would hurt the most. If Niall didn’t even believe him.

“Say that again,” Niall whispers when his breathing is almost back to normal.

It takes him a second, and his mouth starts tasting metallic from where he’s bitten harshly down on his lip. Enough to draw blood. He still doesn’t look at Niall when he repeats those three small words with so much sincerity in his voice. “I love you.”

“Again.”

Louis can’t help but snort out a laugh, but he still repeats the words. When his eyes finally drift from the road and over at Niall, he’s met with so much fondness and a small smile that shows the hidden dimple on Niall’s cheek. Just like that, all the worry is gone. That’s not the look on someone who’d turn you down, gently or not.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” Louis says, and from the corner of his eye, he can see the way Niall’s face become softer for every time he repeats the words.

“You’ve got a terrible timing,” Niall pouts. “If you hadn’t been driving, I’d have snogged you right this second.”

“Don’t say that!” The words leave with a whine, and Louis is about ready to pull over just so he’s able to do exactly as Niall said.

Niall just laughs, but it’s so much softer than it was earlier. It’s a whole other laugh, and Louis loves how the only person he’s ever heard Niall laugh at like that is him. Not anyone else. It’s for Louis only.

“I love you, like no one else,” he just says still with laughter in his voice. Louis’ heart skips a beat, pure joy running through his body.

¤¤¤

Niall kisses Louis when the stop for the night. Their noses bump together and there are a little too much teeth until Louis pushes Niall back in his seat and then holds his head between his hands gently. The kiss is anything but that, Louis being too eager for slow and loving. Niall groans when Louis bites down on his lip and intertwines his fingers into Louis' hair. He pulls a bit too hard, so Louis pinches Niall’s nipple in return.

“What did you do that for?!” Niall yelps, pulling away from the kiss, eyes a little too big and face prettily flushed.

Louis just smiles at him smugly. “For pulling my hair, you dick.”

“Bloody fucking impossible, that’s what you are!” He’s cute when he grumbles, so Louis can’t quite help himself when he leans in and lets his lips meet Niall’s once again. It’s more playful than anything, nothing more than a cheeky snog.

Louis’ smile is sharp when he pulls back once again. “Haven’t even wined and dined me yet, what do you expect, Nialler?”

Hearing the words, Niall sighs and lets his head fall back against the seat. His frustration is nothing short of adorable, and really Louis could probably play this game for days. It doesn’t even matter that he’s wanted to kiss Niall for what seems like forever, because now he can, and he’ll be able to again in five minutes and in an hour and tomorrow. Hopefully forever. Niall would let him, no matter how much Louis is teasing him right now. Louis just knows he will.

Maybe that’s why he decides to ignore the urge to tease Niall, and instead pulls Niall with him to the back of the car and pins him down on the seat. They spend hours snogging, though Louis enjoys the moments when they just lie there both trying to catch their breaths, their lips still just barely touching, just as much.

¤¤¤

They reach LA in the early morning after driving through the night to finally get there. Niall sleepily points out the Hollywood sign, with only one hand on the steering wheel. Louis has half a mind to tell him to concentrate on the road, but he’s too tired to bother. He’s been taking small naps through the night but has tried to stay awake with Niall.

“I can’t believe we made it,” he mutters. He’s glad that the windows are open, ruffling up his hair and making it just bearable to stay awake.

“Me neither. I’ll never be able to forget this trip,” Niall says softly. Louis can only agree. He could become a hundred years old and suffering halfway from dementia and he’d still be able to remember all the good things this trip gave him.

“Thank you,” Louis can’t help but say, which just makes Niall look over at him in question. “For letting me tag along. Still can’t believe you asked a stranger to follow you to the other end of the world, but still, thank you for not leaving me behind. Wouldn’t have known what to do with myself.”

“You’re being soppy. Disgustingly so even.” Louis pouts at him, and Niall just laughs in return. “But if we’re being soppy, then thank you for not finding me crazy and for saying yes to going. Wouldn’t have been the same without you.”

“Well for one, you’d been here a lot sooner,” Louis teases, remembering back to the one plane ticket left for LA, and how Niall had turned it down in favour of going on an adventure with Louis.

Niall laughs in return, seeming a bit more awake as they get closer and closer to the city. “If that isn’t true! Worth it, though.” The glance he sends Louis is adoring and Louis is sure his own eyes are looking just as fond. But it’s true. It was worth every penny, and worth every minute.

They drive for about half an hour more, before Niall finds a parking lot and pulls over. Louis looks at him questionably, but Niall just ignores him, and reached into the backseat and starts turning their things over, apparently looking for something. He emerges with both their wallets in his hand and settles back down in his seat.

He then proceeds to pour all the content of both wallets into his lap, which turns out to not be all the much really. Louis keeps quiet while Niall quickly gets a count on how much cash they’ve got left. Louis really doesn’t know how what little is left is gonna get them anywhere.

“Should be enough for a hotel and food for a few days, if we find somewhere cheap. Not much else, though,” Niall says, not sounding all that bothered that they’re in LA, homeless and with barely any money left.

This plan probably wasn’t all the well thought through in the end, Louis can’t help but think. What even were they thinking? That they could just leave for LA without a plan or the money to settle down. To be fair though, then Louis wasn’t thinking straight. Not when he left Doncaster, and not when he on a rim decided to follow Niall to the other side of the world.

“What are we gonna do after?” Louis asks, even though he’s dreading the answer.

The answer turns out to be no answer at all because Niall just bites his lip and doesn’t say a word. He hasn’t got any more of a clue that Louis has.

None of them says anything for so long, and in the end, Niall reaches for his hand and holds it in his own. His fingers are cold against Louis’ own, despite it being warm and sunny outside. Louis doesn’t like the thought much, that maybe Niall isn’t quite as confident in this whole thing as he’s made it seem.

Louis considers proposing them just sleeping in the car until they figure something out. The money would last longer if they didn’t have to pay for a place to stay. He knows though that they can’t stay in the car forever, and that they both need to sleep in a real bed and get a shower. Frankly, then none of them smells like roses anymore.

It’d be harder as well, finding somewhere undisturbed to sleep in the city.

“C’mon lad, let’s find somewhere to stay,” he mutters and gives Niall’s hand a gentle squeeze.

Niall smiles up at him, and Louis really appreciates how he always tries to face the world with a smile. It makes it easier for Louis to put on a brave face of his own, and let go of Niall’s hand so the other lad can have both hands on the steering wheel.

They drive around for a while, Louis looking up cheap motels on Niall’s phone, while also half keeping an eye on everything around them to see if anything pops up that the phone just shouldn’t happen to know. It takes them a while, but eventually, Louis’ got both their backpacks hung over his shoulder, and Niall’s guitar in his hand, while Niall checks them in lousiest motel Louis’ ever seen. The man behind the counter looks like he’s a second from biting Niall’s head off, and Louis has never seen Niall look so uncomfortable, his whole body stiff as he’s standing as far away from the man as possible. It’s a damn relief when Niall gets handed over a key with a room number written on the keychain.

“Please hurry,” Niall pleads, eyes wide, as he returns to Louis. Not that the words are needed, because Louis’ feet are already moving.

“Yikes,” Louis whispers, taking in the hallway as they move towards their room. The wallpaper is hanging, and there’re variously sized stains both on the walls and the carpet. The doors look like a mild wind could knock them down without much trouble. Letting his eyes run over one particular suspicious stain, Louis can’t help but think that it looks like an old crime scene that someone forgot to clean up. He can’t quite stop the shudder that runs through his body.

Suddenly staying in the car sounds like heaven.

Niall looks determined, though, quickly making his way down the hallway until he reaches the right number. The door’s stuck when he tries to unlock, and he has to pull the key in and out and turn it a couple of times before he’s finally able to get it up.

“Won’t have to worry about thieves. Not even the actual key really knows how to unlock this shite,” Niall says, trying to lighten the mood.

“We’re gonna die in there. Gonna get stuck forever and starve to death,” Louis groans. “That’s it if someone doesn’t kill us first.” He looks back down the hallway, that one spot still in mind, though he can’t see it from here. Well, that’s something at least.

Niall answers him with a roll of his eyes. “We’re not gonna bloody die here. Stop being a drama queen, Lou.”

“I’m very well gonna do exactly as I want to! Dramatic my arse!” With that he marches past Niall and into the room, bags still hanging all over him. He also makes sure to wriggle said arse enough for Niall to know it’s intentional. He’s rudely only met with a laugh in return.

It’s not as bad inside the room as Louis had feared. It’s still plenty wonky, with a lumping bed, a chair that’s only standing because of what Louis suspects is a whole roll of duct tape. There’s a door to the toilet that actually closes and the sheets on the bed actually look like they’ve been changed. Louis figures he’ll have to take the small wins in this case.

He gingerly puts Niall’s guitar down on the table leaning against the wall. The table moves enough that Louis holds his breath, ready to catch the guitar just in case the table falls over. It takes a couple of seconds, but eventually, the table stops wobbling.

The two backpacks he throws on the floor, where the carpet looks the least stained.

“Dibs on getting the first shower,” Niall says, already pulling off his shirt, and tossing his shoes off.

“Yes, please, you stink,” Louis says, and makes a big deal of holding his nose to really show him just how much.

“Like you smell any better yourself, princess,” is all he gets in return as Niall is already halfway into the bathroom. Whatever.

Louis settles down on the bed. When he closes his eyes, he can almost imagine being somewhere more pleasant. Maybe somewhere where it would’ve been fun following Niall into the bathroom, or where rolling around in bed wouldn’t mean the risk of catching something. It'd be easier if there wasn’t something poking his back, that Louis seriously just hopes is a spring in the madras.

He hears a high-pitched shriek from inside the bathroom at the exact same moment the water starts running. Well, there goes the hope of a warm shower.

Niall comes out a couple of minutes later, still shivering as he goes right for his backpack and pulls out the cleanest outfit he’s got left.

Louis bites his teeth together tightly and takes a damn cold shower. It’s okay, though, when he’s got an excuse to cuddle close to Niall underneath the covers afterwards, trying to get back the warmth in their bodies.

They both fall asleep surprisingly easy, everything considered.

Waking up the next morning is less pleasant. Niall’s no longer in bed with him, in fact, he’s not in the room at all. There’s a piece of paper lying on the side of the bed Niall should have been preoccupying. His heart skips a beat, and his palms are getting sweaty. He’s shaking a bit when he reaches for the note. Only one thought in his head. _He’s left me._

Turns out Louis is an idiot because the note just says that he went to find a laundromat and some food for them and that he’ll be back soon.

For a bit, Louis considers just going back to sleep until Niall comes back, but the bed seems even lumpier than it did last night, so he quickly ends up deciding that he can just as well just get up. Niall left with his phone and their bags, so there isn’t really anything for Louis to do. He eyes Niall’s guitar that’s still lying on the table, and after sitting for a couple of minutes doing nothing at all, he tiptoes over to the table. He’s being careful with it, as he takes it out of the bag. For some reason, it feels like he’s doing something he’s not allowed to, and he can’t help but guiltily look back over his shoulder to the door like Niall’s going to be back any second now. To be fair, though, then maybe he is.

In the end, Louis decides that since Niall’s never explicitly told him he’s not allowed, then he won’t kill Louis for playing around with the guitar.

He doesn’t really know what he’s doing, but he still sits down crossed legged on the bed with the guitar in his lap. There’s something immensely satisfying about pulling at the strings and making sounds. He tries to remember how Niall played some of the songs he’s been playing in the car, but he hasn’t got much of a recollection of any chords. Just playing around with it is entertained enough as well until he hears the door go.

Louis catches the worry in Niall’s eyes just as he steps into the room before it changes back into the fake happiness as soon as he notices that Louis is awake.

“Hoped I could get back before you woke up,” Niall says cheerfully, putting down their bags on the floor, and a paper bag on the table. “Can see you’ve entertained yourself why I was away, though.” He nods towards the guitar but doesn’t seem too bothered about it, so the last of the guilt disappears from Louis’ mind.

“You alright?” he asks, because he doesn’t like the way Niall’s hiding everything behind a smile. They need to talk about this.

“Sure. Got us some sandwiches.” He turns his back to Louis and starts fiddling around with the paper bag, pulling out napkins and two wrapped sandwiches.

“Niall,” he says, as Niall turns around and hands over one of the sandwiches.

“Just eat your food, Lou.” Niall’s pleading him with his eyes, so Louis bites his tongue. No matter how much he wants to keep pushing the topic then he doesn’t want to force Niall into talking if he doesn’t want to.

“Alright.”

It’s the first time any silence has been awkward between the two of them. Louis just nips at his sandwich, not really feeling much like eating at all. He should enjoy it while he has it. Who knows how long they’ll have any money for anything at all.

“I was thinking about busking?” Niall interrupts the silence, looking unsurely up at Louis.

It’s not a lasting plan, but Louis supposes everything is better than doing nothing at all, and honestly, then Louis doesn’t have any better suggestions. He nods, not knowing what to say, so he just doesn’t say anything.

It’s when Niall leaves Louis alone once again, this time with the guitar in his hands, leaving Louis absolutely nothing to do, that he really realises in how deep shit they’re going to be in if they don’t come up with a real plan anytime soon. They’ll end up on the streets with empty pockets and nothing to their name. Louis can’t handle the thought of that, not at all.

That day while Niall is away Louis finds newspapers and walks past several stores in the hope of finding that one sign of ‘help needed’. The shop windows are empty, and the newspaper gives him nothing but frustrations.

He’s back before Niall is, having lost whatever hope he had left in him when he left. It’s late when Niall sneaks into the room, and Louis pretends to be asleep as Niall gets ready for bed as well. He feels soft lips on his forehead, fingers grazing his cheek, and Louis considers then letting Niall know he’s awake so he can get a kiss goodnight. In the end, he chooses not to. He’s not sure why that’s it exactly.

The next two days continue like that. Niall’s out of the door in the early hours of the day, leaving enough money behind for Louis to get something to eat, and then comes back late in the evening. They barely talk at all those days. Louis keeps trying to search for some sort of job, something that’d make sure they won’t be totally screwed. He keeps finding nothing, and Niall keeps only bringing back barely nothing at all.

It’s all too uncertain, and Louis suddenly misses how Niall would at least pretend to be happy. So, Louis is frustrated and lonely, and Niall doesn’t seem to be doing much better either.

Maybe that’s why he snaps on the third day when Niall actually comes back looking somewhat excited. Snaps without really taking in what’s supposed to be good news.

“Louis!” Niall yells, bursting through the door with a big smile on his face. “I’ve got a gig!”

“Before or after we’re homeless?” Louis mutters, from where he’s lying on the lumpy motel bed. He’s been there for a couple of hours now, having giving up on it being his lucky day long ago. Staring into the wall for ages hasn’t done anything to make his mood better. He knows he’s supposed to be excited for Niall, ask questions and tell him he’s proud, but Louis kinda just feels empty inside. Empty and tired, and just not in the mood.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” The smile is taken over by a frown. There’s no happiness left, but somehow that isn’t good enough. Louis wants him to be mad. Mad enough to yell, so Louis has an excuse to as well.

“That we’ve got no fucking money left, and only has paid for two more days here! What are we gonna do after that, Niall, huh? What did your awesome little plan how in store for that scenario? Oh, right, you never thought to think that far!” His voice gets louder with every word he speaks, and he gets up from the bed. The other seems to break a little at Louis words, wincing with the truth of it.

“No one bloody fucking forced you to come with!” Niall yells back at him, hurt written all over his face. Louis takes a step back, being too close to Niall even though they’re still so far apart. He kinda wants to strangle him, kinda hates himself for the look on Niall’s face.

It doesn’t stop him from continuing the screaming match. “It’s all because of your stupid dream! Your stupid dream that won’t get us anywhere!”

Louis knows he’s gone too far then, because Niall’s face twists, hurt not being enough to describe it anymore. He looks absolutely devastated. Louis can’t take it, so he storms past Niall without looking back.

Louis’ heart is racing away, anger still running through his body, though sadness and guilt too quickly take over. He regrets smacking the door in Niall’s face and just taking off. It’s their first real fight, and they should be talking about it, and yet here Louis is being a child about it all.

He just doesn’t know how to handle Niall being mad at him, is all. Not when Niall is nothing but sunshine always. It just makes the whole fight then times worse.

Slowing down his movement, Louis takes note of where he is and where he’s going, so he’ll be able to find his way back. He’s not exactly interested in getting lost on his own in LA. It’s only fun getting lost when Niall’s there to laugh at him when he gets frustrated because he’s never really lost when Niall’s with him.

For a while he just wanders around, aimlessly, just knowing that he can’t go back just yet. Not when there’s the risk of Niall still being mad.

Catching sight of an empty playground, Louis figures it’s better sitting down on a swing for a while than upping the risk of getting lost by walking around. The swing gives a bit under his weight, but when nothing else happens, he assumes he’s safe enough to push the swing back and forth with his feet still touching the ground.

He closes his eyes, pretends for a while to be a kid again. How his mum would always keep pushing the swing until he was flying high into the air. He pushes the thought away when it only makes a lump form in his throat. Everything seems to be getting to him right now.

The worst is how excited Niall had been, and how dismissive Louis had been of him. After all those times Louis has told Niall to follow his heart and words whispered of how much he believes in him, then Louis can only imagine how much it must have hurt having Louis crush everything like that. Louis hates himself for the expression on Niall’s face when the words left his mouth. He’s got no excuse for his behaviour either.

Louis hasn’t really had a good feeling of what time it is for a while, but he assumes it must be early afternoon when a couple of kids start filling up the playground.

He doesn’t realise how long his eyes have been following the kids in their play, until one little boy with a happy shriek yells out, “Mommy!”

The lump in his throat returns as the little lad runs straight towards her not even paying his friends any mind. It’s a little too close to how Louis used to act around his mum when he was just a kid himself. Before her and his dad got more distant and started to care too much about the business. Louis misses that time so freaking much.

Something breaks inside him as he watches the boy hug his mum, and babble about everything he’s been doing with his friends that day.

Louis wants to be able to hug his own mum, wants to tell her about everything that’s happened since they last talked. Wants to tell her about Niall and have them meet. He just wants to feel like he doesn’t have to run from his family.

“Let’s go home, darling,” the woman says, and the boy takes her hand and waves goodbye to all his friends.

Louis wants to go home as well.

¤¤¤

Louis breaks down the second Niall opens the door for him. This whole thing is too much. Knowing that they’re out of money and only has got a day more with a roof over their heads is too much. That fight with Niall earlier is too much. Seeing that little boy with his mum is _too much_. Enough to break him into the crying mess that’s standing in front of Niall.

Niall doesn’t even hesitate to pull Louis into a hug, every trace of the anger from earlier completely gone in a matter of seconds.

He doesn’t know what to do, or how to explain everything, so he just doesn’t.

He’s got Niall whispering sweet nothings into his ear, slowly rocking them back and forth until the worst of the sobbing is gone. With gentle fingers, Niall brushes away the tears from Louis’ cheeks. He smiles at him, but there’s no joy in it. It’s just fake and wrong. A pretend to make Louis feel better.

Right now, there’s only one thing that really will make him feel better, though.

“Can I borrow your phone, Ni?” Louis chokes out. He feels so lost like he’s a million miles away from home. In a way he is. Louis just really needs to hear his parents’ voices, even if they’re the reason he needed to get away from there in the first place.

“Sure thing, Lou,” Niall murmurs and lets his lips touch Louis’ forehead in a soft kiss. It only makes everything so much worse. “Do you need me to leave?”

It hurts so much having to say, but Louis can’t do this if Niall’s right there with him. “Yes please.”

“Okay. Tell me when you’re done, alright? I’ll be right outside.” Louis just nods.

He hands over the phone to Louis, who takes it with shaky hands. He’s got this look on his face, like a kicked puppy, and Louis just wants to hold him in his arms forever. To keep him away from anything that would ever make him look like that again. Louis just wishes that it wouldn’t be him who did it. Niall doesn’t kiss him again before he leaves, but Louis really, really wants him to. Maybe he’s selfish because he knows that nothing will be the same when this phone call is done. Nothing can be when the bubble first bursts.

When Niall has closed the door behind him, Louis slowly enters the numbers into the phone. The only phone number he ever bothered to learn by heart.

 _“Hello_?” he hears on the other end of the line, his mum’s voice so easy to recognise. She sounds tired and sad like Louis hasn’t ever heard her sound before.

“Mum,” he whispers into the phone.

“Louis?” She doesn’t say anything more, whatever she might have wanted to say taken over by a sob. It doesn’t take Louis long to match hers with a sob of his own.

¤¤¤

Louis doesn’t go out to get Niall. Can’t seem to make himself leave the bed not when he knows what he’ll have to do now. Eventually, though, Niall comes back inside on his own. He stops at the end of the bed, not making a move to get any closer to Louis. He doesn’t say anything, just looks down on his hands as they fidget with the bracelet around his wrist. The one that matches Louis’ own.

“There are some things that you cannot outrun,” Louis says, breaking the silence between the two of them. An explanation even though Niall hasn’t asked for one. He deserves it none the less. “I just needed to try anyway. I can’t keep running forever, though, Ni.”

“And to stop running, you need to leave me, don’t you?” Niall’s voice is meek, and he won’t look Louis in the eyes. Louis has never seen Niall look so subdued. It’s like all the colours and all the warmth have disappeared in a matter of seconds. It’s the worst thing Louis has ever had to face.

He can’t answer. Can’t say the words. Niall knows, though, that the silence is all the confirmation he needs. He swallows harshly, loud enough for Louis to hear, and nods in understanding.

“Suppose you can’t follow me to the end of the world, no matter how much I would like you to.”

“You could come back with me,” Louis can’t help but try. He knows the answer to that before he even says the words.

Niall shakes his head, barely noticeable. He takes a step back, away from Louis. Louis fights to not reach out for him, to not beg him to not leave. He’s not allowed to do that. Not anymore. Not when he’s the one leaving in the first place.

“I’m not done running just yet,” he says, voice shaking as he says it, and the words still break Louis’ heart no matter how matter how much he knew they were coming. It breaks his heart even more that he’s the reason Niall looks so unsure when he says it.

“You shouldn’t be either. I’m sorry about what I said. Your dreams aren’t stupid, Ni. They’ll get you so, so far.” He has to say those words before it’s too late, has to let Niall know that no matter what then Louis still does believe in him. No matter what he said, and no matter if he’ll be there or not when those dreams become reality. Niall doesn’t bother with an answer, but Louis doesn’t really think he deserves one either.

Niall turns to leave, but just as he reaches the door, Louis can’t stop the words from leaving him. “Do you hate me?”

The pause at the door seems to be only for a second. Niall shakes his head without looking back at Louis. “No. I love you too much to ever be able to hate you.”

He leaves then, not a single glance back. The door closes quietly behind him, though Louis wishes that he would just have slammed it. It would have hurt less if he had hated him. Louis curls into a small ball on the bed. It doesn’t make anything easier. The bed smells just like Niall, and Louis just wants to call for him to come back. Wants to tell him that they can keep running. He’s gone, though, and it’s too late to regret it now. 


	3. Chapter 3

_England_

His mum turns up in the door opening. It’s long past midnight, and Louis should be asleep, but instead, he’s curled together on the sofa, tv on the golf channel in the background for no other reason than Louis remembering how passionate Niall usually talks about the sport. There’s no way Louis will ever be able to understand why, but he misses the other lad enough that he’s still watching. He won’t even pretend to himself that he’s not that pathetic.

“Can’t sleep?” she asks him, slowly coming closer and eventually sitting down by his feet.

Louis just shrugs. He probably could if he really tried to, but everything just feels wrong. They haven’t talked much since he got home last night. She’s kept trying to make him talk, but Louis doesn’t know what to say. At least she’s trying. His dad looked at him this morning, send him a disappointed glance and then left for work. Not a single word to him.

She pats her lap, and after considering for a moment, Louis gets up long enough to turn around with his head rested on her thighs. With gentle fingers, she starts playing with his hair as she used to when he was still a little boy.

They’re both silent for a while before she eventually starts talking. “I’m so sorry about everything. It was never meant to hurt you so much that the only thing you thought reasonable was to run. I only want what’s best for you, always.”

“I don’t see how wanting what’s best for me turns out to be marrying me off to some girl in a business deal,” Louis grits out. He understands why his dad would see that being the best thing because the business has always been his number one baby, but it’s different with his mum. At least he had thought it was.

“Louis William Tomlinson,” he mother starts out sharply, a tone she only uses with him when she’s either mad or disappointed with him. He’s not sure how that’s fair, but he still winces. Somethings never change. “I’d never just marry you off to the better deal! And I’d never allow your father to either. The only reason I ever agreed to any of this was because I myself made sure that the boy would be perfect for you. And if you had met him and said no then it would not have happened. Deal or no deal.”

“A boy? But I…” Louis whispers, eyes becoming wide. Only Niall has ever known that he’s not that into birds. Louis has never told her that. Never had the courage to.

“Yes, Louis, a boy,” she laughs, but her voice sounds a bit thick like she’s trying not to cry. “I think I know you a lot better than you realise. There are very few things in this world you could tell me that would surprise me.”

“Why’ve you never said anything then?”

“Because it was for you to tell, my love.”

Louis nods slowly, which is a bit hard still lying down. He thinks he gets it. That doesn’t mean he understands how she could make that decision for him, no matter how much she tried to make it as good for him as possible. He’s not a kid anymore, and this is his whole future that would be affected.

His mum hums softly while playing with his hair, and all Louis can think about is all the hours in the car where Niall was humming one melody after the other. Seems like everything reminds him of Niall like he’s the only thought left in Louis’ mind.

“Tell me about him?” Louis eventually asks, because thinking about Niall when Niall is no longer a possibility, makes his stomach turn unpleasantly.

“I only met him once. His parents brought him along to a dinner with me and your dad. He was about your height, cute with a nice smile and a laugh that made you want to laugh along with him. Stunning blue eyes and soft looking brown hair. He seemed a bit shy, but I think that’s mostly because of the dinner and not knowing why he was there. He was taking business classes in uni, but I got the feeling that what he really wanted to do was music. I’ve never seen anyone as excited when talking about something as he was about his music,” she says with a laugh, but Louis feels queasy suddenly. “He told me about playing footie when he was younger, but damaging his knee, so now he’s mostly golfing. Don’t make that face, Lou, no one is gonna force you to go golfing.”

“Mum,” he forces out, face paling and eyes wide. No, it can’t be! That’s too unlikely to ever happen. Everything just fits perfectly, though. Louis thinks he’s going to be sick. He pushes her hands away and sits up to better be able to look at her. “What’s his name, mum?”

“He’s Irish, and only moved here a couple of months ago so you probably won’t know him. His name is Niall Horan.”

“No.” The word comes out as a whisper. “No, no, no, no!”

“Louis? What’s wrong?” His mum reaches for him, but Louis barely even realises. He’s too lost in his thoughts, too lost in knowing that he could have gotten everything, but he left because he got scared. “Louis!”

“I…” Louis’ voice breaks, and he can’t quite hold back the sob. “I met him. I was with him this whole time.”

He can’t say the last part. Can’t say he fell in love with the boy and then left him behind to run back home. That he got scared and took the easy way out, even though the only thing he wants is to love Niall with his whole heart. She seems to understand anyway. Her face falls, and she pulls him into her arms, hugging him close.

“Oh, love.”

“I don’t even know where he is anymore. I’m such a fuck up.”

“None of that now! What about calling him?”

“That would require I had his phone number,” Louis says, trying not snarl at her. It’s his own damn fault, and it’s not fair letting it out on her.

“Whose phone did you use to call me with?” she just simply asks, and Louis’ eyes become wide. He doesn’t even have to say anything for her to hand over her phone.

It’s easy finding the right number. She hasn’t called anyone but his da since Louis talked to her from Niall’s phone. His hands shake, and he has to take a deep breath before he pushes the call button. He’s mentally preparing himself for everything he has to say to Niall when he answers. Instead of hearing Niall’s voice, though, every hope Louis had, is destroyed when he hears, “ _The number you have reached has been disconnected.”_

Louis doesn’t cry, just silently gives back the phone to his mum.

“I’ll go to bed now,” he says hoarsely, swallowing the lump in his throat.

“Louis?” she says, worried and not understanding what just happened.

He just gets up on his feet and starts walking without answering and without looking back. He needs to be alone right now. He doesn’t want her pity and promises that everything will be okay. Just knowing that it’s all his own damn fault is the worst of it. Had he just stayed, then he could have had everything. Instead, he left, and Niall moved on.

He curls into himself when he gets to his bed. Rests his head on his arm where the bracelet Niall gave him is still around his wrist. It’d be easier if he could just forget everything. In reality, he knows that even if he could then he wouldn’t. Every memory he has with Niall is one of the best he’s ever had, even if it hurts now. He couldn’t give those up for anything.

“Be happy,” he whispers, wanting nothing else than for Niall to be there to hear the words. “Be happy even if I’m not there to be so with you. You deserve nothing less.”

¤¤¤

Seconds turn to minutes turn to hours, then to days and eventually weeks. Time passes by slowly, too slowly. Second by second, minute by minute. Life goes on, but there’s not a single day where Louis doesn’t think about Niall. Where he doesn’t regret every single decision he made.

His mum keeps looking at him worriedly, trying to make him talk and trying to make him laugh and smile. Louis feels a bit empty inside. He tends to steer around her when possible. He can’t take her sadness on top of his own. His dad on the other hand still tends to ignore Louis as much as he can, and when not, he’s forcing down Louis’ throat how he needs to grow up and get his shit together.

All in all, it makes Louis spend a whole lot less time at home that he would have otherwise. Instead, he spends time with old friends, that doesn’t feel much like friends anymore. Louis seems to always be ten steps behind, no matter how much he tries to catch up.

Maybe it’s because he keeps comparing them to Niall, which isn’t fair in any way. Not to them or to himself, or even to Niall. He needs to realise that what he had with Niall is over, and he needs to move on. Niall isn’t coming back, and Louis doesn’t expect him to either. Why would he when he succeeded in getting away like he wanted to? There was never any doubt in Niall’s mind about what he wanted, not like there was in Louis’.

A couple of days after getting home, and after the talk with his mum, Louis had tried to find Niall on social medias. The only place he’d been able to find him was Facebook, and for days Louis had waited for a message back that never came. Eventually, Louis stopped expecting it to.

One day Louis had come home to a stranger sitting in the living room with his mum. It wasn’t exactly an unusual thing, so Louis had been on his way to his room with a short hi into the room when his mum had called on him to come in there. The woman’s name had been Maura, and his mum introduced her as Niall’s mother. Maura had made him tell her everything about their trip, and then she had cried a little afterwards. She had hugged him and thanked him for telling her that her son was okay.

They’d eaten lunch together a couple of times after that because Louis felt bad and the smile on her face any time he talked about the things the two of them had been doing was worth the ache in his heart afterwards.

Most nights Louis fell asleep with music playing softly in his earphones because he’d gotten too used to falling asleep to Niall’s quiet humming. Too quickly his library on iTunes gets filled up with songs from all the artists Niall used to talk about, and Louis’ heart skips a beat every time he recognises a song Niall had sung for him.

Life goes on, but it’s also weirdly stuck on a single track. Even without Niall being there beside him, then he still somehow seems to have taken over most aspects of Louis’ life.

Three months after getting home is when any little stability he’d gotten back into his life disappears. Something as simple as him changing the channel on the radio mindlessly when the one he was listening to gets boring. He hits the brake with his foot so suddenly that his head almost hit into the steering wheel, only prevented from doing so because of the seatbelt holding him back. His heart is beating harshly in his chest, as a vaguely familiar melody reaches his ear.

Someone honks at him from behind, and seconds later a car drives by him, the driver making a crude gesture as it does so.

Louis doesn’t even pay it any mind, because words are following the melody. Words Louis remembers Niall singing to him when he was still unsure about how everything was supposed to go. He just sits there listening closely to the first verse, though it’s when it’s over and the words Louis doesn’t know follow, that he completely loses his breath.

_“…then you spoke your truth with no secrets  
told me use your heart while it’s beating_

_When you’re right here beside me, there’s nothing else I need_  
your eyes keep me reminded that nothing’s out of reach  
when you’re with me, it feels like I’m finally free  
feels like I’m finally free...”

The first sound he makes as the song continues playing is a choked-up sob. There’re no tears, and Louis tries his best to stay completely silent as the song goes on, too quickly going into the endnotes.

Louis just knows that this song is for him. Knows, because Niall once promised him that he’d sing it for him when it was done. Knows, because no matter what then Niall was as happy with him as he was with Niall. There’s no spite, no hate in the song, only happiness and hope, and Louis doesn’t feel like he deserves that. He knew what Niall wanted to do with his life, but he still didn’t expect him to make it this fast. Maybe because he always assumed that he’d be there with him when he did. But he’s not, and Niall didn’t need him to get there, no matter what the song makes it sound like.

_“That, ladies and gentlemen, was the brand-new song, Finally Free, from debut singer Niall Horan, who’s newly signed with Capitol. After blowing up with his first few singles in America, Niall is right here in the studio to promote his music in the UK as well.”_

_“Hey!”_ Niall says, and Louis can’t help but close his eyes shut.

He should really get his shit together and continue driving, or at the very least get away from where he’s stopped in the middle of the road. The street’s been empty since that first car, and Louis just can’t bring himself to care. He doesn’t care, because Niall is right here in London. So, so close to Louis, but still just out of his reach.

 _“Talk to me, man. How did this all come to be?”_ the radio host asks, though Louis barely listens to the words. He just waits for the moment it’s Niall’s voice filling his ears once again.

Niall laughs into the microphone, drowning the whole car with the sound Louis has been deprived of for what could just as well have been millennia. _“Really, that’s a long story. I could tell you about the dreams, and the things driving me to leave home, but really, this story begins when I met this one boy. That one person who never questioned those dreams but reminded me that nothing is out of reach. That’s the starting point, now let me tell you the end.”_

**Author's Note:**

> As said then I kinda ran out of time lmao, so if it's a bit wonky a couple of places then it really wasn't intended. Thank you for reading along <3
> 
> The post for this fic can be found on my tumblr [here!](http://nialliesmiley.tumblr.com/post/178386413708/to-the-end-of-the-world-niall-horanlouis)


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